User:J.X. Guggenheim

My name is J.X. Guggenheim. You should probably realize that it's not my real name, seeing as throwing one's real name out into cyberspace is not exactly the wisest move in the chess game of life. I am here to grace the thousands of articles with my veiled, false presence and my editing prowess. An anonymous source once described me as "seven feet tall, with an abdomen of lard." I can validate, as of this moment, that that "fact" is indeed false...just like my identity on this world-wide encyclopedia. One of the joys of joining Internet communes is that you can create a double, someone that is you (in reality), but to everyone else's eyes, ISN'T you. It gets confusing on occasion, but I've had plenty of practice. Just keep in mind, the great and secluded J.X. Guggenheim is your knowledgable friend...and I'm always watching. *maniacal laugh* Just kidding. In all seriousness, I'd sooner open a bag of Orville Reddenbacher's sweetened corn than throw my true information out there, where whackjobs lacking authority and self-control can easily grab it and twist it around to where it becomes something that is used against me. So, you see, there's at least a small level of wisdom and discretion required to operate behind a veil, such as I am doing.