User:JeanIClarke/Overindulgence

Overindulgence Overindulging children is giving them too much of what looks good, too soon, too long. It is giving them things or experiences that are not appropriate for their age or their interests and talents. It is the process of giving things to children to meet the adult's needs, not the child's needs.

Overindulgence is giving a disproportionate amount of family resources to one or more children in a way that appears to be meeting the children's needs but does not, so children experience scarcity in the midst of plenty.

Overindulgence is doing or having so much of something that it does active harm or at least stagnates a person and deprives that person of achieving his or her full potential.

Overindulgence is a form of child neglect. It hinders children from doing their developmental tasks, and from learning necessary life lessons.

An occasional indulgence contributes to abundance and makes the child’s life better. Overindulgence creates problems in the child’s life and is associated with serious risk factors for the child’s later adult life. It is more than too many toys, material overindulgence. Doing things for children that they should be doing for themselves (over-nurture, or relational overindulgence, which includes helicopter parenting), and soft structure (structural overindulgence, lack of rules and chores,) often create more later life problems than too many things that cost money.

Overindulgence was originally defined by Jean Illsley Clarke, Connie Dawson, and David Bredehoft in '''How Much is Enough? Everything You Need to Know to Steer Clear of Overindulgence and Raise Likeable, Responsible, and Respectful Children''' (2004). The definition is based on information gathered from in-depth interviews with adults who reported having been overindulged as children.

It appears that overindulgence is widespread and that parents are the major indulgers. There are many reasons why parents overindulge with good hearts and the intent to make life better for their children and/or themselves without realizing the accompanying hazards.

The How Much Is Enough? book offers specific ways to counter each of the three ways overindulgence happens.