User:JhanysG/Kissing The Witch/Mbjones00 Peer Review

General info
User:JhanysG
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:JhanysG/Kissing The Witch
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Not available yet

General Thoughts:
I greatly enjoyed reading your sandbox draft, and I'm impressed by the amount of content already in your sandbox, especially since you are creating your page from the ground up. Bravo! Your writing is mostly concise (I'll talk more in the Logistics section), your tone is neutral and clear, but you also keep a great flow of introduction in the beginning, explanation in the middle, and "who were you before" at the end of each story summary. You are very aware of how interconnected your book is, and that's reflected by how deligent you are with your hyperlinking. Below, I will go more in depth on some logistic things I noticed that you could consider!

Logistics:
Introduction Section: I would remove the "Article Draft" Main Heading, since I don't think there are usually Headings for the Introduction piece.

Hyperlinking: Hyperlink the "feminist" and "queer" Wikipedia pages that you touch on in the Introduction Section. Hyperlink "stanza" the first time you mention it. Hyperlink San Francisco's Magic Theatre and/or any of the actors if they already have Wikipedia pages.

Structure: I would probably split "Styles and themes" into their own Headings because I think you'll have a lot of content for each section. Being combined will be dense, and you summarizing each story is already dense (rightfully so! because you have a lot of content to get through). It's hard for me to say since I don't know the inner workings of each story, but there were a couple of stories I thought that could be shortened: The Tale of the Apple and/or The Tale of the Handkerchief/Hair. Instead of saying "(Bases on X)" as a separate paragraph in each story section, maybe you could try mixing each hyperlinked fairytale into the summarized paragraphs. My example from The Tale of the Apple: Like the original tale of Snow White, her mother shares... You get what I mean? Lastly,

Need clarification: Are there any names? You consistently describe what the narrator does, and I wondered if there are any names mentioned in any of the adapted stories? There is Beast, father, stepmother, witch, etc. If no name is provided, I think that would be a great addition you could briefly mention in the introduction when you discuss how the stories are all linked together, then develop more in your "Structure" section.