User:Jiayun Chen/Balkan Romani/Fnt7 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Jiayun Chen


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Jiayun Chen/Balkan Romani


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Balkan Romani

Lead

 * To improve your lead, make sure you include info from each of your body paragraphs, otherwise the reader will not know what they are going to find within the body of your article. The opening sentence does, however, clearly describe what is to come. The lead briefly describes some following sections, but not all. It does not include info that is not in the article. It is very concise--too concise, and would benefit from more details as aforementioned!

Content

 * I believe all the information is relevant to the topic thus far. Based upon the bibliography, the information seems up to date as well. I think some more cultural info re: the culture surrounding the Balkan Romani people and language might help. Are there holidays, songs, books etc. that center around the language/are written in the language? Are there fairytales or fables? Furthermore, I believe this topic DOES relate to underrepresented people: the Roma are a people constantly misrepresented in media or slandered whether purposefully or not, so that is something to be careful with, especially right now with the misrepresentation/complete erasing of Romani people in enormously popular media such as Marvel's Wandavision. That such large companies could thoughtlessly erase identities in such ways is obviously heinous, and adding to that culture would only be harmful.

Tone and Balance

 * Yes, the article is neutral in tone; there are no biases found! As there aren't really viewpoints so much as there are facts, I do not believe the question regarding viewpoints in the writing applies. No persuasion tactics are applied.

Sources and References

 * I believe the "Dialects" section could use some citations, but otherwise all of the information is satisfactorily cited. The info does reflect the sources. The sources are thorough and current. The sources are written by an array of authors, both in English and other languages, which brings varied perspectives and information to the research. Peer reviewed articles are used, therefore I feel the sources are as trustworthy as they could possibly be! The links to the sources do work!

Organization

 * The content is easy to read for the most part, but there are areas where it feels like sentences could be simplified or combined: the Vocabulary and Lexis section feels wordy, as does the History section. You could literally use fewer words to say the same things, which would help with clarity when reading! Otherwise, the content is well-organized. It makes sense for it to be in this order. If you include a Cultural section, I would recommend putting it after the Writing Systems section.

Images and Media

 * If you are to add images, I would recommend something relating to the culture. I know the Romani people are somewhat famous for their cultural clothing--maybe that could be something relevant to include images of?

Overall impression:
So far, the information is relevant and adds well to the info supplied by the original editors of the article. I believe once your new information is added, you will have added significantly to the quality and the range of information readily available re: the Balkan Romani dialect. The information you have found and the sources you found it in all seem to be relevant, trustworthy, and recent. So long as the info you add is phrased in a concise way, I imagine the article will be strong once complete!

(not sure if the signature function is working for me so I'll sign this manually too: peer-edited by Francesca Tangreti or fnt7)

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