User:Jkydrovo/Censorship in North Korea/Ma1619 Peer Review

I believe the first sentence could use a little bit of cleaning up. I think it is too wordy and it doesn't have to be.

I like the background information in the first 2 paragraphs I believe it provides good insight into who the article will be talking about and his role in Korea.

I feel like each paragraph could lead into each other a little smoother just so it doesn't seem like it is jumping from topic to topic.

Overall I think it is a good article that just needs some slight changes to elevate it.

General info

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 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
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