User:Juwanm/Biodiversity in agriculture/Ari. gg02 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Juwanm


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Juwanm/Biodiversity in agriculture - Wikipedia


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Biodiversity in agriculture

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Overall, this contribution was well written, and the author was clear and knew a lot about the topic.

Heterogeneity

Paragraph 1:

First sentence: great start!

This paragraph is written very well, uses correct terminology and not too much jargon for the general public, but enough for those scientifically familiar.

Paragraph 2:

In the first sentence, it can be changed from "maintain" to "maintains stable ecological..." Perhaps change the second "essential" to a different word like necessary, vital, required, etc. It could be rewritten as: "Heterogeneity is also essential in increasing species heterogeneity, which maintains stable ecological structures necessary for providing ecosystem services."

The second sentence can be rephrased for more fluidity: Among the features of species diversity, is land size. A study has shown that there is a correlation between smaller agricultural fields and increased species richness. Sometimes, using a study in an article tends to make the point of view a bit less neutral or more pointed towards the finding of the article and what the authors were trying to find, and it is a bit more challenging in an encyclopedia. As it does relate heavily to the content, it makes sense, however, perhaps add a bit more information so the part about the study is not too out of the blue.

In the third sentence, change "organisms accessibility" to "organisms' accessibility" to imply we are talking about the accessibility of the organisms. Edges of the field can also be changed to field edges, unless it is the proper term for what you are writing about.

In the fourth sentence of the paragraph, change "accessibility to a diverse ecological features" to "accessibility to diverse ecological features", unless there is a term missing in between ecological and features.

Key points:

Keep an eye out for grammar and punctuation, as it does have an effect on how fluid and well-written the article is. Proofreading and editing is a necessary task for us all writing these Wikipedia articles.

It is a really interesting topic and I am looking forward to seeing what else the author will contribute to this content!