User:Jzdollar/Enver Pasha/Wvc9 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(Jzdollar)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Jzdollar/Enver_Pasha?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Enver Pasha

Evaluate the drafted changes
The draft does not start with the beginning of the article, however it begins with the "Pan-Turkism and death" section from the original article. The new lead in the draft for this section of the article is well written and provides new information researched by the writer which was not included in the original article. The draft is very well written and provides a lot of information not seen in the original article, however there are a lot of claims which do not have a citation attached to them. The draft does a good job of presenting the information in a clear and unbiased way, the information is presented in a completely factual manner without the writer's personal opinion. The writer did include a credible source, however the draft could possibly be improved by the inclusion of a wider range of citations. The evidence is cited in MLA format throughout the article and at the bottom of the page, however the article could be improved by the inclusion of wikipedia style citations. The article is written well from a grammatical and stylistic standpoint, however it could be improved in its referencing to Enver Pasha by his first name, as the article would appear more professional if he was referred to by his last name. However, despite those small errors the draft is very well written, interesting, and contains lots of relevant information to the topic.