User:KatlynnT/User:005926215jrc/Yolanda Gonzalez/KatlynnT Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

User: 005926215jrc


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:005926215jrc/Yolanda Gonzalez
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * User:005926215jrc/Yolanda Gonzalez

Lead
The introductory sentence does describe what the article will be about, but there could be more information presented here. I would also suggest switching up the order to let readers know the type of art Yolanda creates (painting/ceramics) before talking about texture, further mediums, etc. Perhaps include a bit more about what is to be expected in the article, i.e. if she has won any awards, if she has been in any shows, or her occupation (or volunteering). It doesn't need to be in-depth or overly detailed, but a small amount more explaining who the artist is. Also, maybe add more to the artist infobox you inserted such as where the artist lives, her ethnicity, etc.

Content
Your content is all relevant to the listed headings, and you did a great job organizing the exhibitions. The content does feel a little empty and lacking, such as with the artist biography, so I would suggest trying to do a little more research to see if any more information can be found. Even info such as when her parents moved to the United States, or details of her volunteer work would be appreciated. Education could also be placed in it's own sub-category separate from the biography.

Tone and Balance
The tone of your article is very neutral, so I don't have much to add here. The work seems to follow requirements and has many sources supporting your topics. Good job keeping the point of view unbiased and informative.

Sources and References
Some content throughout could use a source, such as information about her parents being artists and her grandmother giving her a painting set that sparked her interest in the arts. Without sources, these sentences seem like they could be forged or fillers that may not be accurate. I would also recommend citing Yolanda's published works. Your bibliography and references seem in-depth and like you conducted a fair amount of research. Your citations do seem to match up with the information you provided, and many of the sources I checked in to have a wealth of information that could further your article.

Organization
There are a few grammatical issues in the article, such as sentences being too short and choppy. For example, the biography says, "She attended San Gabriel Mission High School, where an art teacher discovered her talents, and entered Gonzalez into an art contest. She placed 1st." You could instead end the sentence, "...an art contest where she placed first." There are choppy sentences throughout the article, and small fixes like this will help the article flow. Spelling is all great, but just work on both sentence and paragraph flow, comma placement, and sentence length.

Overall Impressions
As I mentioned a few times above, I feel like the article could be a bit more in-depth, especially after looking through a few of your sources and seeing how much information you have access to. More of a story could be told of the artist's life and upbringing and how it influenced her work. I would also recommend placing links throughout your article as well- not sources, but linking certain words to other Wikipedia articles, for example, German Expressionism (since you mentioned this in the article). Your organization of the article overall is strong and clear; the only suggestions I have are improving sentence structure and adding more information found in your research. Overall, good job on your article and your research.