User:KenDoyle1221

KENNETH DOYLE SHOCK POLITICAL CAREER MOVE

After the success of his debut first album “Life in the Sewers of PNG”, KennyD made a shock announcement during a recent trip to the Dail Eireann “I’M GOING TO BE THE NEXT BLOKE IN CHARGE IN THIS HOUSE!!!” he proclaimed from the front gates while Brian Cowen was giving an interview with RTÉ news about the future of the government. The announcement was greeted with laughter but Mr Doyle looked very serious and said: “I’m serious lads I’m going to be moving in to Number 10 very soon”.

The very next day he registered for political life. When asked what party he will be joining, he replied “I’m not joinin any F****ing party, I’m a lone ranger, I’ll run this country on me own”. The new Independent T.D. will have a small canvass campaign consisting of his mate who is a window cleaner, his uncle who owns an ice-cream van and his nan who “could talk for Ireland”. He also appear on news talk tomorrow to outline his plans for his government •	On underage drinking he made the point: “If you lower the drinking age to 11 then there won’t be any underage drinking.

•	On the financial problem he made the point; “no problem I’ll take all the tax-payers money and go to Las Vegas for two weeks and we’ll be sorted”

•	On education he proclaimed: “who needs a leaving cert I don’t have one and I’m the next bloke in charge”

•	On childcare and health he stated; “doesn’t matter if someone dies some bird is bound to be pushin out one of my kids somewhere”

He also said he was better than Biffo and the people should “give us a go, if you don’t like me then tough”.