User:LRonHoover03/Fonio/Banff33 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

LRonHoober03


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Fonio&diff=prev&oldid=1141977098&diffmode=visual


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Fonio

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Commercialization in the West section comments: Good neutral tone to introduce this new section, while still showing how fonio has become a more well-known grain.

European Union section comments: Great source about how Italian companies are trying to make fonio pasta more widespread on the European continent. I'm curious to know if it has become more widespread in 2022/2023 since this source shows that commercialization of fonio was approved in December 2018.

United States section comments: Could consider moving this section above European Union because this source talks about importing and selling fonio in 2017, a year before a more widspread adoption in the EU.

Black fonio section comments: Great addition of adding traits that are similar to white fonio and where it is cultivated. This gives readers an understanding of why people may not have heard of black fonio before.

Overall, great work so far. Good sources that help to paint a stronger picture of fonio. No grammatical or spelling errors found in the edits and there is no biases found in the phrasing of the content. The only change I would consider is re-ordering the Commercialization in the West section, and potentially seeing if there are additional sources to add to the European Union subsection if there have been noticable changes with the introduction of commercialized fonio. Great job strengthening this article!