User:LavenderCloud/Self-diagnosis/Mgoyena Peer Review

Lead


 * Strong introduction and sets up the article and your additions well
 * Concise and relevant

Factors that influence self-diagnosis

Marketing influence


 * "Self-diagnosis has been promoted by pharmaceutical and medical companies in order to increase their revenue"
 * May need to tweak to make this sentence a bit more neutral
 * Or add a source?
 * May need additional sources - only used 2 sources and used Ebeling 4 times
 * Re-examine topic sentences for neutrality, show don't tell and rely on the strength of your sources

The Role of Stigma


 * More sources? relying heavily on 2 sources in this section which might skew the information
 * Maybe introduce the source at the beginning of paragraphs where you will rely on one resource for most of the information so that the reader is aware of the perspective

The impact of self-diagnosis on varying demographics

Ethnicities and socio-economic background


 * In the "vulnerable demographics" section, make sure source that the data is pulled from is cited clearly next to the information
 * demographic percentages don't seem to have a clear source
 * hyperlink out "dx"
 * fix typo - "autostic," "jeopardise"
 * subject verb agreement - " the advice on social media (TikTok) is incorrect"
 * good job providing differing sources and viewpoints

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(provide username)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)