User:Liyah8118/NSYNC/LexieYoungg Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

User:Liyah8118/NSYNC


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Liyah8118/NSYNC?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * NSYNC

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

When editing or making edits, make sure that there is a way that the reader can tell where you are putting this information is going. Even if you just add "my edit" before or put where you are adding the information to. For example, maybe say "adding to history section" to make it easier to see what you are doing for the information. It can help you also as the writer to be more organized. When reading the information that you have provided, I do feel like I am looking at a Wikipedia article, but I do not understand where this information is supposed to go in the original article. I think that the links to each of the awards that was won was a great add to make sure that the audience of the article is able to understand what each of the awards are. I also think that there is one sentence that sounds a little bias, adding the word "unfortunately" into the sentence makes it seem as if it was a bad thing when others could've thought it was good. Maybe get rid of the word unfortunately completely and just said " he was unable to make it". You do have a lot of information on a lot of different stars, and I think that gave information to the audience and a better understanding of the different stars that have won awards or if the readers of the article did not know who a certain celebrity way, they will most likely have a better understanding now.