User:Lkshephe/Military psychology/Peytonmk Peer Review

General info
Lkshephe
 * Whose work are you reviewing?

User:Lkshephe


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Lkshephe/Military psychology
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Military psychology

Evaluate the drafted changes
The things that have been added are relevant to the topic of the article, but they aren't peer-reviewed or secondary literature. The links do work and are informational articles that are designed for lay consumers, which makes them easy to access and easy to read. However, I don't know that they are exactly what we should be going for with this assignment. It may be beneficial to spend some time searching databases like google scholar, PsychInfo, or even the UAB library database for some good secondary literature related to the topic. Systematic reviews and meta-analyses would work really well here! Reading through the article, I noticed that the "Role" section and the "Terrorism" sections are both lacking in citations. Even those that are present do not work. It is good to aim to have a recent citation every few sentences to ensure that all facts are well documented. This could be a great area of opportunity for you as you work to improve the article.

While the article appears neutral, the first few sections rely heavily on only a couple of citations, which may lead to an unintentional bias simply because multiple viewpoints are not being represented.

There are several areas throughout the article where the writing could be improved, consolidated, and clarified as well, which may be beneficial to work on.

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A few writing thoughts/suggestions:

While the service members may be providing direct aid to the victims of events, military psychologists are providing specialized aid to both members, their families, and the victims of military operations as they cope with the often "normal" response or reaction to uncommon and abnormal circumstances. Military psychologists can assess, diagnose, treat and recommend the duty status most suitable for the optimal well-being of the individual, group, and organization. Maybe consider adding a line about the ability to conduct research as well, since it comes up later in the paragraph.

Through the use of group therapy, individual therapy, and behavior modification, these psychologists are qualified and  '''actively treat psychological disorders, most commonly emotional trauma. When counseling those individuals in the military personnel's family (instead: When counseling the families of military personnel), military psychologists most often provide grief counseling for those who have lost a loved one in the line of duty. Working in research as a military psychologist entails performing personnel research, such as determining what traits are best utilized in which positions, training procedures, and analyzing what variables impact the health and performance of military personnel.''' Events that affect the mental state, resilience or psychological assets and vulnerabilities of the warrior and the command are where military psychologists are most equipped to meet the unique challenges and provide expert care and consultation to preserve the behavioral health of the fighting force.

'''To become a military psychologist, a doctorate is necessary. Once obtaining a high school diploma or an equivalent, a bachelor's degree focused in the area of psychology is recommended. After getting a bachelors, graduate school is the next step. To become a psychologist, an individual must have a graduate degree, either a Masters or Doctorate, with education taking anywhere from 2 years and 2 to 4 years, respectively.'''

''Is a doctorate necessary or only a master's? You said that a doctorate is necessary in the first sentence and then went on to say that either a Master's degree or a doctorate degree was necessary. It could be helpful to clarify that. You could also note if the responsibilities would differ between the two.''