User:Lmlambe3/Magical girl/Jpatlas24 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Lmlambe3


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Lmlambe3/Magical girl


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Magical girl

Evaluate the drafted changes
Addition of a Controversy section is excellent since it's missing from the article right now, but only if it's relevant. The first section of this sections talks about Analee Newitz's article analyzing the genre and its similarities to American shows, but I don't see how that's controversial. When it begins discussing the issue of the characters only performing magic at home or in secret, then I begin seeing how it could be controversial.

Addition of the History section seems unecessary, as there isn't much content there and what is there should be fleshed out a bit more. Also, the article already has a Genre history section which has quite a lot of content right now. Can this information not be worked into the Genre history? (Unless that was the intention, in which case this is a non issue).

The information in the Background section sounds controversial to me, perhaps it should be included in the Controversy section? I think it could also work in the lead introduction section.

The content in general seems relevant to the topic (with the exception of the first few sentences in the Controversy section).

I didn't see any sway in tone or general preference, and it's concise and clear.

No images have been added (not that they need to be, but it could be a good addition when discussing new topics.) The article itself only has one image, which could be problematic.

Overall, besides the afformentioned edits that could be made, the additions seems well put together.