User:Lpbenton

Memorable Quotes All quotes are anonymous unless otherwise noted. 

I don&#39;t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.



Our character is how we behave when we think no one is looking.



Rather than asking&#44; &#34;How is life treating you&#63;&#34; &#45; try&#44; &#34;How are you treating life&#63;&#34;  J.D. Boatwood

  

Anarchism is founded on the observation that since few men are wise enough to rule themselves&#44; even fewer are wise enough to rule others.  Edward Abbey

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<li>Talent hits a target no one else can hit&#59; Genius hits a target no one else can see. <ul> <li>Arthur Schopenhauer

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<li>a.&#160;New roads&#58; new ruts.

b.&#160;You shouldn&#39;t take a fence down until you know the reason it was put up. <ul> <li>G.K. Chesterton

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<li>I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it. <ul> <li>Mae West

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<li>Never attribute to malice what can be adequately explained by stupidity. <ul> <li>Nick Diamos

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<li>Things are only impossible until they're not. <ul> <li>Jean&#45;Luc Picard

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<li> The whispered lie is just as wrong as the one that thunders loud and long.

&#160;&#160;and a few more by Willam George Plunkett (W.G.P.) <ul> <li>A bachelor is a man who comes to work from a different direction each morning.</li> <li>A cigarette not butted could mean a forest gutted.</li> <li>A doctor has a successful practice when he can afford to tell his patients the truth when there is nothing wrong with them.</li> <li>A duty&#45;free store &#45; where you go broke saving money.</li> <li>A friend is one who knows all about you but likes you just the same.</li> <li>A girl could be right when she thinks no man is good enough to marry her. She could also be left.</li> <li>A lot of us would rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.</li> <li>A man who rests on his laurels is wearing them in the wrong place.</li> <li>A stumbling block to some can be a stepping stone to a shrewder man.</li> <li>A swollen head is Nature&#39;s frantic effort to fill a vacuum.</li> <li>Advanced age is not necessarily synonymous with authority.</li> <li>All the brains in the world are not under your own hat &#45; go easy in criticising others.</li> <li>Always choose a busy man when you want a job well done&#44; the others haven&#39;t the time.</li> <li>An alcoholic is a person who drinks more than you do.</li> <li>An average man wants fair play &#45; with himself umpiring.</li> <li>An excellent survival kit &#45; a well filled wallet.</li> <li>An intelligence test often shows how smart one would have been not to take it.</li> <li>As you grow older it&#39;s not so hard to resist temptation as to find it.</li> <li>Beauty parlours are like steak parlours &#45; men rare and women well done.</li> <li>Before you argue with a fool make sure he is not similarly occupied.</li> <li>Behind a truely successful business man there are many years of non&#45;success.</li> <li>Beware of half&#45;truths &#45; you may have the wrong half.</li> <li>By the time most men have money to burn&#44; the fire has gone cold.</li> <li>Critics are very often people who speak out with the full confidence of ignorance.</li> <li>Don&#39;t count your pearls before they&#39;re matched.</li> <li>Experience is the art of not making the same mistake too many times.</li> <li>Father of teenage daughter when answering the telephone; &#34;No this isn&#39;t dreamboat this is supply ship&#34;.</li> <li>Getting up early is simply a matter of mind over mattress.</li> <li>Good deeds are seldom accompanied by big words.</li> <li>How does a woman over forty look under thirty? She makes up the difference.</li> <li>Husbands are like fire on the hearth &#45; likely to go out if left unattended.</li> <li>If you should lose your temper&#44; don&#39;t look for it.</li> <li>If you wish to please everybody&#44; make sure you please yourself first.</li> <li>Ignorance is when you don&#39;t know something and if someone finds out you don&#39;t know.</li> <li>Ignore the dog that barks&#44; but beware the one that fawns upon you.</li> <li>Intuition is how a woman knows for sure without knowing for certain.</li> <li>It gives great satisfaction to be helpful rather than be helped.</li> <li>It&#39;s not making ends meet that&#39;s so difficult&#44; it&#39;s making the ends hold still.</li> <li>It&#39;s wise to provide for the things that can&#39;t happen &#45; they&#39;re the things that do happen.</li> <li>Life not only begins at forty&#44; it begins to show.</li> <li>Many a man who goes off for a day&#39;s fishing doesn&#39;t catch anything &#39;till he gets home.</li> <li>Many couples find that the most difficult year of marriage is the one they&#39;re in.</li> <li>Most men who dies nowadays &#34;with their boots on&#34; have had their foot on the accelerator.</li> <li>Motor cars produced this year will run into millions &#45; no doubt they will.</li> <li>Nothing is impossible to the man who hasn&#39;t got to do it himself.</li> <li>Nudists are people who suffer from &#34;clothestrophobia&#34;.</li> <li>One of man&#39;s consolations with old age is that he may now whistle as he brushes his teeth.</li> <li>One of the heaviest burdens a man can carry is a chip on his shoulder.</li> <li>One way a husband can make his wife listen is to talk to another woman.</li> <li>Parents who make the most mistakes with their children are most often the ones who make the most sacrifices.</li> <li>Philosophy can be summed up in two words&#34; &#34;abstain&#34; and &#34;sustain&#34;.</li> <li>Self portaits are generally coloured.</li> <li>So few people carry umbrellas when offering prayers for rain.</li> <li>Some people think they are in tune with the infinate when they are out of tune with the definate.</li> <li>Standing on your dignity does not help you see over the heads of the crowd.</li> <li>The Taxation Department must love poor people &#45; it creates so many of them.</li> <li>The chance of a pedestrian getting an even break depends on where the vehicle hits him.</li> <li>The current price of cigarettes certainly makes smoking a weath hazard.</li> <li>The fellow who takes a helluva lot of interest in his work is the money lender.</li> <li>The future will pay those who are patient with it.</li> <li>The hardest thing for any young man to learn is that he is so like other men.</li> <li>The shock absorbers on buses are known as passengers.</li> <li>The week&#45;end is when you slow down and let the strain go by.</li> <li>The woman&#39;s work that&#39;s never done is most likely what she asked her husband to do.</li> <li>There may be plenty of room at the top&#44; but there&#39;s no room to sit down.</li> <li>There&#39;s a lot to be said for nudist camps. You at least can tell the girls from the boys.</li> <li>Those who aspire to a place in the sun must expect blisters.</li> <li>Those who believe that where there&#39;s smoke there&#39;s fire&#44; haven&#39;t tried cooking on a camping trip.</li> <li>Wealth buys leasure&#44; but not wisdom.</li> <li>When you say things aren&#39;t what they used to be&#44; don&#39;t forget to include yourself.</li> <li>When you win the race of &#34;keeping up with the Joneses&#34; you&#39;ll recieve your trophy &#45; bankruptcy.</li> <li>Women can keep secrets as well as men &#45; it just takes more of them.</li> <li>You won&#39;t convince others unless you first convince yourself.</li> <li>You&#39;re on the road to success when you realise that failure is merely a detour.</li> </ul>

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<li>Those who lose dreaming are lost. <ul> <li>Australian Aboriginal Proverb

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<li>In nature there are neither rewards nor punishments &#45; there are consequences. <ul> <li>Robert G. Ingersoll

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<li>Most of the trouble in the world is caused by people wanting to be important. <ul> <li>T.S. Eliot

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<li>Water finds its own level &#45; except in a storm. <ul> <li>P.K. Shaw

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<li>We always admire the other fellow more after we try to do his job. <ul> <li>William Feather

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<li>The men who try to do something and fail are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed. <ul> <li>Lloyd Jones

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<li>It is only the man whose intellect is clouded by his sexual impulses that could give the name of &#34;the fair sex&#34; to that undersized&#44; narrow&#45;shouldered&#44; broad&#45;hipped and short&#45;legged race. <ul> <li>Arthur Schopenhauer (1788&#45;1860)&#44; German philosopher

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<li>To keep your marriage brimming&#44; with love in the loving cup&#44; whenever you&#39;re wrong&#44; admit it; whenever you&#39;re right&#44; shut up. <ul> <li>Ogden Nash

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<li>What&#39;s past is prologue. <ul> <li>William Shakespeare

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<li>Our greatest glory is not in never falling&#44; but in rising every time we fall. <ul> <li>Confucius

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<li>Iam not young enough to know everything. <ul> <li>Oscar Wilde

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<li> If life was fair&#44; Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead. <ul> <li>Johny Carson

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<li>The point to remember is that what the Government gives it must first take away. <ul> <li>John S. Caldwell

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<li>A programmer is someone who solves a problem you didn&#39;t know you had in a way you don&#39;t understand.

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<li>As years go by people tend to minimize the pain and magnify the emotions.

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<li>I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow&#39;s not looking good either.

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<li>I love deadlines. I especially love the swooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

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<li>Tell me what you need&#44; and I&#39;ll tell you how to get along without it.

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<li>Accept that some days you&#39;re the pigeon&#44; and some days you&#39;re the statue.

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<li>Needing someone is like needing a parachute. If they aren&#39;t there the first time you need them&#44; chances are you won&#39;t be needing them again.

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<li>My reality check bounced.

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<li>On the keyboard of life&#44; always keep one finger on the escape key.

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<li>I don&#39;t suffer from stress &#45; I&#39;m a carrier...

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<li>Everybody is somebody else&#39;s wierdo...

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<li>Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.

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<li>Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

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<li>&#34;I am.&#34; is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that &#34;I Do.&#34; is the longest sentence?

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<li>If the singular of GEESE is GOOSE&#44; shouldn&#39;t a Portuguese person be called a Portugoose?

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<li>Happiness is not how much we have but how much we enjoy what we have.

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<li>Before criticizing someone&#44; walk a mile in their shoes. Then&#44; when you do criticize them&#44; you will be a mile away and have their shoes.

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<li>If trees could scream&#44; would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might&#44; if they screamed all the time&#44; for no good reason.

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<li>To me&#44; it&#39;s a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way&#44; if anybody says&#44; &#34;Hey&#44; can you give me a hand?&#34; You can say&#44;&#34;Sorry&#44; got these sacks.&#34;

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<li>If a kid asks where rain comes from&#44; I think a cute thing to tell him is&#44; &#34;God is crying.&#34; And if he asks why God is crying&#44; another cute thing to tell him is&#44; &#34;Probably because of something you did.&#34;

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<li>If you ever catch on fire&#44; try to avoid seeing yourself in the mirror&#44; because I bet that&#39;s what REALLY throws you into a panic.

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<li>Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk&#44; my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think&#44; what if I was an ant and she fell on me. Then it wouldn&#39;t seem quite so funny.

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<li>I hope if dogs ever take over the world and they choose a king&#44; they don&#39;t just go by size&#44; because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.

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<li>It&#39;s easy to sit there and say you&#39;d like to have more money. And I guess that&#39;s what I like about it. It&#39;s easy. Just sitting there&#44; rocking back and forth&#44; wanting that money.

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<li>I can picture in my mind a world without war&#44; a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world&#44; because they&#39;d never expect it.

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<li>Whenever you read a good book&#44; it&#39;s like the author is right there&#44; in the room talking to you&#44; which is why I don&#39;t like to read good books.

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<li>During the Middle Ages&#44; probably one of the biggest mistakes was not putting on your armor because you were &#34;just going down to the corner.&#34;

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<li>Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights&#44; even if you don&#39;t know what your rights are&#44; or who the person is you&#39;re talking to. Then on the way out&#44; slam the door.

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<li>If you&#39;re a cowboy and you&#39;re dragging a guy behind your horse&#44; I bet it would really make you mad if you looked back and the guy was reading a magazine.

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<li>It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare&#44; it is because we do not dare that they are difficult.

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<li>Do not take life seriously because you cannot come out of it alive.

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<li>The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon&#44; but that we wait so long to begin it.

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<li>Some cause happiness wherever they go&#59; others whenever they go.

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<li>The hardest thing of all to be is a well of affection&#44; and not a fountain; so we can show love&#44; not when we feel like it&#44; but when others do.

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