User:Lphan2310/Technology/Azulrosa12 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

I am reviewing: Lphan2310.

Lead
In the Lead, the author provided a reflected information towards technology. The person does included a topic sentence with clear and straight details. The Lead is is specific towards what the author wants to get across from. A suggestion would to add more information towards ethnical social implications. Also, a suggestion equity and access so it able to incorporate information towards modern life.

Content
Something to consider for your overall writing is the material would be improved and readers might have a better comprehension with more detailed explanations and visuals. Just adding more details into your paragraphs. I liked how the paragraphs combined with your topic.

Overal Impression
Overall, the author did a good job in explaining his point of view towards technology. Also, through the sandbox, the information was we'll formatted an explain towards the correct sections. Adding more information, will be able to expand on your perspective and the perspective on our society. It will be able to run smoother your information, so the audience know the point of view a bit better.