User:LydBo/Gonatus onyx/Rebeccar44 Peer Review

General info
LydBo
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:LydBo/Gonatus_onyx?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Gonatus onyx

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Lead: The opening paragraph does a great job introducing and providing some background information about Gonatus onyx, including its characteristics, habitat/geographical location, size etc. I think you can add a brief description of the articles main sections for more clarity.

Content: I think the content added is very useful. You provided a detailed description of the reproductive and spawning of Gonatus onyx. I think the language is very clear and not too wordy, as I could clearly understand how their reproduction works. I like how you expanded upon the adult life and behavior, by adding information about the color changes of adults and how this aids them in survival. In the “Range and Habitat” paragraph, maybe you can explain what bimodal means ( the average person may not know what this means).

Tone and Balance: All claims appear neutral to me. There are no elements of persuasion, but rather just useful information/facts. Good work!

Sources and References: I noticed that there are not as many recent sources used ( most sources from early 2000’s). Are there any more recent findings/ sources that you can refer to?

Organization: I found the organization of the paragraphs very easy to follow. I think it is helpful that the content is broken up into different sections, allowing for better organization and flow. The writing itself is concise, flows well and appears free of grammatical/spelling errors. If you want, you can change “a rate as high as 42% of prey being of the same species” to “ a rate as high as 42% of prey belonging to the same species” for better grammatical flow.

Media: Maybe you can add a photo of an adult squid that is orange, to display how these squids can change colors to escape from predators. I see that there is already a photo of a more white squid on the main page, and I think it would be cool to see both potential squid colors as well.

Overall impressions: I think you all added very useful content. For example, the adults ability to change colors to escape from predators was very interesting and useful information. It seems that the main article already has a lot of information, but you did a good job incorporating new information and expanded upon what is already there. In the google sheets, I see that you were concerned about the language making sense to non-science readers. I think your writing flowed very well, and that the language was clear and understandable!