User:M.kal54/Epidemiology of pneumonia/Srmmicro24 Peer Review

Lead

Lead has been updated, new statistics, information, data has been added. I like how the original documents information is in the beginning and then updated information follows to make it recent. The sentences are direct and concise, giving only factual information with no opinions or extra statements. I really liked how the first paragraph focused on global information looking at multiple areas of the world and showing where the disease is most prevalent.

Content

Content is up to date. I appreciate how the edits made to the document were obvious. Lots of information has been added and information that is no longer relevant has been striked out. I really like how information was presented in the three separate paragraphs, starting with global information with children and then focusing on specific regions in Europe and the United States.

Tone and Balance

Tone is neutral and factual. There are no bias statements. Good mix of global and domestic data showing representation.

Sources

Lots of sources are used, all from reputable/credible sources including the WHO, Journal of Public Health, other journals of medicine, and infectious disease journals. Many in text citations are good. All statistics given had a source to accompany it.

Organization and Images

The organization is well thought out. I don't think the paragraphs need to be rearranged, all of them flow well from one to the next. My only suggestion would be that it might be beneficial to add in an image or graph to keep the article engaging.

Overall

Overall the article is very enhanced! I really appreciate all the additions and the effort shown. Definitely made the article more informative. Great job!

General info
M.kal54
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Epidemiology of pneumonia
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):

Evaluate the drafted changes
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