User:M79 specialist/quotes

My Made Up Quotes
I got my scholarship from Bill Gates. Where'd you get yours? Your MOM?!?!

Whatever boats your float!

я не говорят русский

Dude, your car goes so slow that the speedometer in it is in incroments of 1/2!

When I become rich I will buy two cars. One will look exactly like the Spy Hunter Car. I will put loud speakers on it and whenever I'm driving around it will play the Spy Hunter theme song. My other car will be an old Buick (boat) which I will put a small mast on. I will then attach a pirate flag and terrorize Drive thru's and many suburban neighborhoods with a rather large train horn.

Is it still a carbureator if it is in a truck?

Keyboard not detected. Push F1 to continue.

No sir, left click. That was a right click. You need to click the button on the left.....Yes, the mouse is on the right, but the button you need to push is the one on the left side of the mouse. - "What If Dr. Seuss Wrote Technical Manuals? by Gene Ziegler

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, And the bus is interrupted as a very last resort, And the address of the memory makes your floppy disk abort, Then the socket packet pocket has an error to report!

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash, And the double-clicking icon puts your window in the trash, And your data is corrupted 'cause the index doesn't hash, Then your situation's hopeless, and your system's gonna crash!

You can't say this? What a shame sir! We'll find you another game sir.

If the label on the cable on the table at your house, Says the network is connected to the button on your mouse, But your packets want to tunnel on another protocol, That's repeatedly rejected by the printer down the hall, And your screen is all distorted by the side effects of gauss So your icons in the window are as wavy as a souse, Then you may as well reboot and go out with a bang, 'Cause as sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang!

When the copy of your floppy's getting sloppy on the disk, And the microcode instructions cause unnecessary RISC, Then you have to flash your memory and you'll want to RAM your ROM. Quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your mom!"

"If you love something set it free, if it returns to you it was meant to be. If not hunt it down and kill it."

A watched page never loads.

Hey, has anyone seen a life? I lost mine in here....

did you know that if you wink at your scrollbar, the chances of it winking back at you are very slim

"What would Gates do if I walked up to him on the street and asked for $100? I mean he can't really say he doesn't have, does he just ignore me? Maybe he'd just hit an immaginary delete key and I'd disappear. He has that much power, you know."

I have found my purpose in life. I am to domesticate zebras.

Confucious man say, "Man with one chop stick go hungry."

You show me a problem that can't be fixed with more sauce... and I'll show you a problem that dosen't need fixing.

"A blonde suspects that her husband is cheating on her so blinded by rage on the way home from work she purchases a gun and some ammo. When she opens the door to her apartment, sure enough, she sees her husband in bed with a redhead. The blonde screams in anger, takes the loaded gun out of her purse, aims it at her husband menacingly, but then pauses. Overcome with sudden grief, she points the gun at her own head and starts to cry. The husband shakes his head and stares at his wife in disbelief. "No, sweetie, don't do it..." The blonde chokes, "SHUT UP, YOU'RE NEXT." "

"Man who run in front of car get tired"

Watching OSU play football more painful than enduring Chinese water torture while having bamboo chutes inserted under fingernails and kung po sauce smeared into eyes.