User:Majorly/Things you'll never hear people say

Just a selection of things you'll never hear said by people on Wikipedia.


 * All agreed?
 * I'm supporting you to look better in my RfA, so please remember my name and vote for me next week!
 * We're all just one big happy family
 * This civility block worked marvellously!
 * Hey, thanks for reverting me. Why am I vandalising, silly me.
 * No, you're right. I guess Wikipedia doesn't really need an article about my new punk-rock-grunge band. I'll go study.
 * I see you have a fair use image in your userspace. Just between you and me, we'll keep it quiet and I'll let you off this once.
 * Why do I want to be an admin? To block my enemies, delete stuff I don't like, and protect my favourite articles. Why else?
 * I retire! I'll probably be back tomorrow though, after a good night's sleep and a hard day's work at school. See you then.
 * Why do I edit Wikipedia? To spread free knowledge, to let others enjoy... blah blah blah who am I kidding, I edit because I'm a bored teenage nerd with absolutely no social life, and nothing better to do.
 * Actually, don't worry, between you and I is fine. It doesn't really matter in the scheme of things anyway, does it?
 * Despite the fact that the RfA was at 90% support and the oppose rationales were nonsense...I decided that there was no consensus to promote the candidate. In addition, while the other RfA was at 51% support and the oppose rationales were very convincing...I decided that there was consensus to promote.
 * I'll be honest here, I hate this candidate, so oppose.
 * I think our admins are doing an excellent job!
 * I've read the diffs, those actions were quite improper and if you had done it I would have banned you for it. But its my buddy so instead I will ban you for tendentious, harassing, frivolous wikilawyering accusations. If you grovel immediately I may stop short of banning you from your talk page. Too late.
 * Wow, this is my last warning. I think I'll stop vandalizing now instead of telling the administrator who warned me to fuck off.