User:Maohe910/sandbox

BACKGROUND
The current divorce rate has been increased dramatically in China with the development of society. Most parents are released from the marriage without love, however, the divorce has become a vicious mental stimulation for children. In most cases, we can easily find that the divorce has led serious psychological trauma, personality changes among some children. Unfortunately, some children have developed mental disorders or diseases. A number of psychologists believe that the death of a loved one is more painful than the divorce of their parents for children. According to a long term study, 37% of children in the five years after the divorce, still remain mental traumatized and have shown depressed mood, depression and isolation. Early studies indicated that children who experience a divorce or remarriage are more likely to withdraw school, violate the law, abuse drugs and show emotional distress compared with children who raised by both biological parents. Studies have shown that children living in single or remarried families are more struggled than those living in healthy and normal families. Some of them are prone to develop psychological problems, such as psychological disorders and mental disorders. Obviously, a considerable part of the children become eccentric, lonely, depressed, melancholy. Also, some children turn to be violent, indifferent, apathy, irritable, and degenerate.

THE EFFECT OF DIVORCE ON CHILDREN
We know that childhood is one of the most significant period for a person's character to shape and develop. Parental influence is enormous during the process of characters’ formation and development of children, and the impact might be lifelong. Fatherly and motherly love can not be replaced or given by others. Divorce itself is not a bad thing, but the consequences of divorce tend to hurt children, trigger personality changes, and promote a lot of bad characters. On one hand, some parents continue fighting and arguing on property, living expenses and children's education issues after divorce. The child's personality could be distorted in such an incompatible environment. Parenting styles, characterized by negative attitude, verbal or physical conflict, and authoritarian behavior, are recognized as being harmful. On the other hand, some single mother or father are trying to release their resentment on children and frequently abuse children. How can children form and develop a good character living in such a freaking atmosphere? Last but not least, for some particular situations, both parents refuse to raise and support their children, thus, they are attempting to remove responsibility to the other side and consider children as obstacles and stumbling stone when they are trying to remarry and organize a new family. Eventually, these children who have a feeling of being abondoned are much easily to be distorted. Research suggests that parental conflict, not parental separation, has the most adverse effect on children. Conversely, in some cases, the divorce will not have much negative impact on children’s development. The divorce parents can still get along amicably after divorce, he (she) never complain the other side to the children, discredit or demonize the other side, but trust the other side and make the children believe both of them are reliable and responsible. He or she does not stop the children to keep in touch with other side, but actively encourage and support children maintain the intimate relationship with the other. Consequently, the child can own both fatherly and motherly love. Generally, the biggest change for children is the lifestyle change without suffering any psychological problems or mental health disorders. Therefore, we want to say to those parents, when you have to choose divorce, please protect the integrity of your children. For parents who are already divorced, it's important to remember that children need strong support systems and individuals in their lives to help them weather their parents’ divorce.