User:MaranoFan/Close Your Eyes

Wikipedia is a beautiful place. A place with diverse colours and folly. You will join the community as a hopeful and it takes you through a rollercoaster: vandals, friends, good people, bad people, etc. It can get very deluded sometimes. It can be very beautiful to your sight, yet sometimes worse than cocaine.

I joined back last year looking at how my favorite artist's articles were in a horrible condition. I edited everyday and everyday, beautifully, contently. I was sitting on a flower petal. I subsequently got a flare of uploading ogg samples. I loved uploading them. I soon figured out that it was not my cup of tea. I hence started creating pages and uploading cover arts.

This became an absolute breaking point in my life, I received my first block. It was a tough time. I read through a lot of guidelines (oh how that didn't help at all). I was a young nerd, blinded by the beauty of a neutral community. I went through bullying, I would come home waiting to see that GA status on my articles, that beautiful barnstar, or anything positive. I started being less on wiki and more outside. I took a lot of script-enforced wikibreaks during this time.

Followed ANI visits and edit wars. I have no regrets and no doubts for having joined Wikipedia. It can help you cope with depression, (that's going to change in some time). I would say that at the end, it is all worth it. That little GA stamp may not be a Pulitzer or anything valuable in real life, but it can be so much to someone who doesn't have any social life. In the end, all that remains of you is your accomplishments. As for the hard part, listen to Meghan Trainor and close your eyes, sing to the world that you are beautiful. Goodbye.