User:Marksmkn3714/Second-impact syndrome/Mattsoml7031 Peer Review

Peer review
This is where you will complete your peer review exercise. Please use the following template to fill out your review.

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing? Marksmkn3714
 * Link to draft you're reviewing: User:Marksmkn3714/Second-impact syndrome

Lead
Guiding questions:


 * Has the Lead been updated to reflect the new content added by your peer?
 * Does the Lead include an introductory sentence that concisely and clearly describes the article's topic?
 * Does the Lead include a brief description of the article's major sections?
 * Does the Lead include information that is not present in the article?
 * Is the Lead concise or is it overly detailed?

Lead evaluation
edits were not made to the lead

Content
Guiding questions:


 * Is the content added relevant to the topic? yes, I like how you talked about the U.S having more reported cases than others
 * Is the content added up-to-date? Yes, they are within the last ten years
 * Is there content that is missing or content that does not belong? I don't know where the information about direct blows to the head and body goes in your edits. Maybe a connecting sentence to bring it together would help readers
 * Does the article deal with one of Wikipedia's equity gaps? Does it address topics related to historically underrepresented populations or topics? Yes

Content evaluation
'''The facts and information are strong and relevant. Needs some stringing together to get the whole picture.'''

Tone and Balance
Guiding questions:


 * Is the content added neutral? Yes
 * Are there any claims that appear heavily biased toward a particular position? No
 * Are there viewpoints that are overrepresented, or underrepresented? It is said that there is "controversy" about SIS in the first sentence, but the controversy isn't explained
 * Does the content added attempt to persuade the reader in favor of one position or away from another? No

Tone and balance evaluation
Good tone and balance, I don't feel persuaded as a reader

Sources and References
Guiding questions:


 * Is all new content backed up by a reliable secondary source of information? yes, sources are from secondary reviews.
 * Are the sources thorough - i.e. Do they reflect the available literature on the topic? yes, sources make clear explanations of what SIS is and the epidemiology related to it.
 * Are the sources current? yes, sources are relevant from the past 10 years
 * Are the sources written by a diverse spectrum of authors? Do they include historically marginalized individuals where possible? yes, theres sources from athletic trainers and other professionals. The review collects data back from 1964
 * Check a few links. Do they work? Could not access the third link

Sources and references evaluation
Overall great sources that contribute nicely to the topic.

Organization
Guiding questions:


 * Is the content added well-written - i.e. Is it concise, clear, and easy to read? Yes, the content is easy to read. I don't know some of the medical words but I'm sure if I read more of the whole article I would understand what you're edits are referencing to
 * Does the content added have any grammatical or spelling errors? No, the sentences are easy to read
 * Is the content added well-organized - i.e. broken down into sections that reflect the major points of the topic? I think the content needs to be organized more, the different facts are scattered around

Organization evaluation
'''I think organization is the most that needs to be worked on. I like the information about the football players and adolescence and the United States. Those are great claims as to why we have a much larger presence of SIS'''

Overall impressions
Guiding questions:


 * Has the content added improved the overall quality of the article - i.e. Is the article more complete? Yes, I believe the epidemiology section of the SIS article is much more improved with these edits.
 * What are the strengths of the content added? The strengths are the very strong facts and points made about sports injuries leading to the rise of SIS in the U.S
 * How can the content added be improved? String together the strong facts to make a powerful paragraph about the epidemiology

Overall evaluation
'''This edit makes very big and important contributions to the SIS article and I can't wait to see how the paragraphs are pulled together in an easy to follow way. Great job and great sources to back it up'''