User:MattDuffy/Ann Coulter Syndrome

Ann Coulter Syndrome (ACS) is a psychological disorder wherein the afflicted gains strength or energy through the accumulated hatred of others. It can develop from prolonged untreated hyper-manic hysteria, and is characterized by bouts of extreme verbal aggression and fantastic paranoid projection.

ACS is named after prominent conservative political commentator and author Ann Hart Coulter, who has documented her own struggle with the disease in her five published books and numerous television and radio appearances.

Causes
Contrary to long-held beliefs that ACS was due primarily to environmental factors such as upbringing, cultural climate and conservative media exposure, a study by the Harvey Center for Independent Research (HCIR) in 2005 concluded that Anne Coulter Syndrome is also due in large part to a latent genetic predisposition. The study also found that ACS is far more widespread than previously believed, and that as many as 27.5% of “the most vociferous mentally-ill” undiagnosed homeless actually suffer from ACS.

Most ACS patients vehemently deny the existence of such a “genetic predisposition”, or even that of genetics in general, making the disorder difficult to treat.

Diagnosis
People with Ann Coulter Syndrome involuntarily disseminate pointed, vitriolic rhetorical tirades whenever an occasion presents itself, often in the form of a perceived “counter-attack” against an imaginary foe or group of enemies.

ACS sufferers tend to speak in wide, unfounded generalities designed to provoke an indignant response from the largest number of rational listeners available. In order to intensify these intended effects, ACS sufferers tend to adopt an inflexible and stubborn defensive posture when confronted in any way, refusing to capitulate or compromise and steadfastly clinging to their psychotic inventions. This adherence to delusional or imaginary precepts has led some psychiatrists to draw comparisons between ACS patients and particularly zealous victims of cult brainwashing.

Treatment
While there is no permanent cure for ACS, listeners who respond emotionally to an ACS sufferer’s outbursts can exacerbate the problem by creating a "negative feedback cycle" and prolonging the intensity of the disease. Consequently, only trained psychiatric professionals should be allowed to listen to or respond to an identified ACS patient, as (following an initial spike in intensity) symptoms will gradually decrease as the patient realizes he or she is being continually ignored.

Prevention
Most mentally-balanced, reasonably-informed individuals are at no risk for developing Anne Coulter syndrome. Those living in high-risk rural or otherwise isolated areas can insure themselves against the development of the disease through any kind of legitimate educational programs (such as public or private schooling), exposure to productive political and social discourse, and a steady diet of books by Al Franken.