User:MayaLis1/Grassroots/Avrillarios Peer Review

General info
MayaLis1
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:MayaLis1/Grassroots
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Grassroots

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hi Maya!

I enjoyed reading more into your research on top-down vs bottom-up processing, specifically in regards to environmental justice. Just like in your other article, I really commend you for how much of your research you were able to fit into this article.

You were able to provide such a concise overview of the debate between top-down and bottom-up approaches in addressing environmental justice issues. You effectively outline the characteristics, advantages, and limitations of each approach, helping readers to understand the nuances of the discussion. I enjoyed how you were able to provide a specific example of a grassroots organization and the specifics of what they do/how it falls into this topic of incorporating participation.

While you were able to add very informative information and present it in a pretty neutral way, I do think that some of the transitions do sound a bit like an essay. I was having a hard time with this too as much of my paper written for class fit directly into the Wikipedia page I am editing. I think one of the easiest ways to prevent this is by not using transitions within the paragraphs; for example, finding a way to begin the sentence without using phases like "however" or "furthermore". This language is commonly used is essays so it could easily begin to sound like an essay when used frequently.

Another thing that caught my eye was that there are a significant number of quotes used within the text. I know Wikipedia typically advises against this, especially full sentence quotes, so it may be beneficial to try and paraphrase (but still cite) the longer quotations. Despite this, I feel that the sources you utilized were very up to date and relevant. Additionally, while we all (in GPP 105) know who Katz is, I wonder if it would be helpful to list his full name the first time he is mentioned and maybe even his main assertion to provide some context. This may be too much, but just a thought.

Finally, while I totally understand why you are emphasizing the need for bottom-up processing, I wonder if other reads may feel that you have some bias towards the bottom-up strategies. This is tough to say because it is clear why you would advocate for bottom-up approaches in addressing environmental justice issues, but Wikipedia may consider this a one-sided argument.

Overall, I think you did a great job and can't wait for you to go live!