User:Mdimola/Pediatric Apheresis/KennyOkg Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(provide username) Mdimola


 * Link to draft you're reviewing Mdimola/Pediatric_Apheresis
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Lead: Does the lead contain an introductory sentence that concisely describe the article's topic?
=== The lead section is very easy to understand but will be better if the topic is briefly introduced and defined as to the meaning of Pediatric Apheresis particularly for the benefit of readers who are not medically oriented but may want to read because they want more information on this topic as a procedural information for a child/ward or for general knowledge. More weight should be given to the lead section to give an idea of what to expect in the remaining parts of the article. There is also a hanging sentence on 'considerations for Pediatric Apheresis', a sign to show that the next few sentences are related to it, will be beneficial particularly a linking word to connect it to the other sentences. ===

Tone and balance: Is the tone neutral?
The tone is very neutral and unbiased. The sections are also very well organized and clear.

Sources and references: Are the sources current?
All the sources are current and the links are all active and working. The links provided are also very relevant to the topic with pictures labelled for easy comprehension in some cases. Do they all align with the Creative Commons of Wikipedia?

There are some long sentences that needs to be referenced and citations to be provided. For example, find related articles for 'low birth weight children', no citations for red cells reconstituted whole blood and 5% Albumin'. These are very important aspect of the article and have been very well detailed but requires citations; they deal with the blood products to minimize adverse effects so should contain article/book source where they were seen.

Organization: The Content is very well organized and contains relevant parts and sections that addresses the topic appropriately.
The overall impression is that this is a very well written article containing detailed information, current references, proper organization and detailed media.

'''Thank you Saidat for your comprehensive and helpful peer review. I have added to my based on your suggestion to add an introduction to apheresis that lay-readers would find useful. I have also clarified the intent of the article in the lead body. Additionally, I have added more links and references to the blood products you mentioned.'''