User:Mgmari19/English-language learner/Amchu24 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Mgmari19


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Mgmari19/English-language_learner?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * English-language learner

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hi Mariela,

Great job with the article edits. I am going off of the article draft in your sandbox and assumed most is original content. If some of my feedback doesn’t apply, please disregard.

Lead


 * Overall: Very clear explanation, good use of sources, wording clarifications
 * When possible, see if you can shorten sentences for clarity.
 * "Several methods have been suggested to effectively teach ELLs including: bringing their home cultures into the classroom, involving them in language-appropriate content-area instruction, and integrating literature into their learning programs". —> “Several effective ELL teaching methods include…"
 * I think the word “some” can be taken out if the entities are stated or cited
 * You can say "educational advocates [such as ____]  classify these students as non-native English speakers or emergent bilingual.
 * Does "ELL achievement” mean the general success of ELL students or is this a specific term? If it’s a separate term/concept, please clarify

History


 * Overall: Interesting content, good use of sources, take a step back to see paragraph flow
 * Main question: Consider what you want the focus of the history section to be. I like that it covers both the terminology and the policy aspect, although I think these two could be broken up into sub-sections. While one is more how the term came about, the other is about the impacts and role in institutional policy.
 * Going through the different policy changes is a really interesting – see if you can build off existing information to help elaborate in the second paragraph (can you cite other wiki articles? or link the text of the specific bills in the footnotes).
 * Try to add a line to each of the bills mentioned if possible or cite out for more context.
 * If interested, add photos for the history section – the English-only instruction law from 1872 may have some powerful photos and media archive websites.

Let me know if you have any questions about this feedback. Great job and good luck on final revisions!