User:Michaelschley11

Excerpt from "the Evolutionary War: The Truths of our Founding Ill-Legitimate Fathers"

... Therefore, Washington is gay and will always be, gay.

Now, to Ben Franklin. He is credited for being an inventor, a writer, and a founding father. But, could he aslo be a spy for Russia? The evidence, as stable as it is, is immense in it's size.

For one, Franklin was a huge fan of the Russian musician, Bellow Kroft, the first Russian Alternative Jazz Rockabilly Oil Powered Citar player ever.

Secondly, it is said in the accurate database of Wikipedia, that Ben Franklin traveled to Russia in search of the Taj Mahal. Franklin was, before his discovering of electricity, a fool. He knew nothing and did nothing. He wasn't well educated, but he made up for it by being the fat slob who's obesity you seem to notice last about him, behind his dandruff-stricken hair, and his plain, chubby face.

Finally, he's a commy. Now, there is no indesputable evidence, but mind you that it is there. It is there.

"Rules of Wikipedia: The Ultimate Tests of Time" These are the indesputable, undeniable, and brilliant rules of Wikipedia when asked why you have a wiki account.

1. Tell them you ment to say a wookie account, and quickly change the subject. 2. Decline to make Eye Contact 3. Make Excessive Eye Contact 4. Begin to answer the question, then fade your voice out into nonsensical rambling. 5. Stammer until he forgets what you're talking about. 6. Say wikipedia is the only accurate online resource we can rely on. Screw Google, this is where it's at! 7. Say Wikipedia is the single worst site ever and tell him for the misunderstanding of hearing you say wiki, threaten to kill him. 8. Exclaim, "Look, A Badger!" and sprint into another room. If, you are in the car, and it is moving, jump. If on a plain, go to the bathroom, wait three hours, then exit with every passenger, whose pants seem slightly dampened, extremely pissed at you. 9. Light him on fire and send him to hell! 10. splash holy water on him him and send him to Heaven. If he's aethiest, send him to purgatory.

And Finally, the ultimate rule of Wikipedia- 11. Dont ever mention that you, in fact, have a wiki account by any means!