User:Millerkm8818/Epidemiology of asthma/Millerkm8818 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Lexinr


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Gizdmojones/Epidemiology of asthma
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Epidemiology of asthma

Evaluate the drafted changes
Overall, you have a really good start. In the first several sentences, you make claims about socioeconomic trends and how they relate to different racial groups, however they are not cited. I would add a source for those claims.

It would be interesting to see some numbers, if available, for areas where you say certain populations have higher numbers than others, like percentages or statistics, but I understand if those aren't available (just a recommendation if available).

I have the same critique for the second paragraph as the first, make sure you have sources for claims about the socioeconomic disparities and their impacts on individuals. As well as the sentence about stressors and increased prevalence of asthma.

The last paragraph feels kind of random, maybe a lead in or something to the topic? I'm assuming that the secondhand smoke paragraph isn't finished yet.

Overall, my biggest critique is making sure that there are sources to back up claims. Other than that I think you have some good information here, good sources, and a really good start to your page.