User:Millie Deroy/Aquamarine (gem)/Sharleen Lawrence Peer Review

General info
(provide username)
 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Millie Deroy


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Millie%20Deroy/Aquamarine_%28gem%29?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template:
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Aquamarine (gem)

Evaluate the drafted changes
Clarity:

- Good lead and background information, very clear

- The Heading are very informative along with the information portrayed'

Balanced Coverage:

- the information throughout is neutral and non-biased

- Good amount of coverage in heading of 'Occurrence' and the quality is very acceptable in terms of high quality

- The headings are was balanced and different but all relating to article topic

Structure:

- the structure is of article is well in terms of citation and heading criteria

Sources:

- the sources listed are good peer reviewed journals and articles

Improvements and Suggestions:

- The article title indicates Aquamarine as a gem, more information geological structure and makeup should be included

- More peer-reviewed references should be incorporated

- Lots of wiki references but more scientific reviewed literature is needed to allow more precise information

- Some sentences do not have references "Civil conflicts can also decrease access to food. Instability in markets resulting in food-price spikes can cause transitory food insecurity. Other factors that can temporarily cause food insecurity are loss of employment or productivity, which can be caused by illness. " this is an example, where did the information come from and how is it backed up