User:Mjocc/sandbox

Irish politics

 * This section could do with more context particularly in relation to the quite widespread sympathy towards the Irish Republican movement on the political left in Great Britain during this period.

Corbynmania

 * I would recommend updating this section with events in 2019. It may also be helpful to include more focus on its role in the 2017 election.

2017 general election
I think this would be a more logical structure for the section...

Corbyn said he welcomed Prime Minister Theresa May's proposal to seek an early general election in 2017.[214] He said his party should support the government's move in the parliamentary vote.[215] The Labour campaign focused on social issues like health care, education and ending austerity.[216] The election campaign was run under the slogan "For the Many, Not the Few"[223] and featured rallies with a large audience and connected with a grassroots following for the party, including appearing on stage in front of a crowd of 20,000 at the Wirral Live Festival in Prenton Park.[224][225] He chose to take part in television debates and dressed more professionally than usual, wearing a business suit and tie.[226]

Earlier in the year, Corbyn had become the first opposition party leader since 1982 to lose a by-election to an incumbent government,[217] and at the time May called the election Labour trailed the Conservative Party by up to 25 points in some opinion polls.[218] A large Conservative majority was widely predicted. Following the short campaign, Labour again finished as the second largest party in parliament but surprised many pundits by increasing their share of the popular vote to 40%, resulting in a net gain of 30 seats and a hung parliament. Although Labour started the campaign as far as 20 points behind, it defied expectations by gaining 40% of the vote, its greatest share since 2001. It was the first time Labour had made a net gain of seats since 1997, and the party's 9.6% increase in vote share was its largest in a single general election since 1945.[218][219] This has partly been attributed to the popularity of its 2017 Manifesto that promised to scrap tuition fees, address public sector pay, make housing more affordable, end austerity, nationalise the railways and provide school students with free lunches.[220][221][222] Corbyn said the result was a public call for the end of "austerity politics" and suggested May should step down as Prime Minister.[218] Corbyn said that he had received the largest vote for a winning candidate in the history of his borough.[227]

Opinion polling

 * This second section on opinion polling could do with being a bit more fleshed out.

Policies and views

 * "but would now bring them under public control "line by line" as franchises expire" this should be associated with a specific point in time or policy announcement
 * "he called upon the Tory government to institute sanctions" avoid using slang term "Tory"

Allegations of antisemitism

 * There is a needs update notice in this section which needs to be addressed.

Other (from CMD)

 * Saw this on the GAN list and had a look. The article is comprehensive, but there is room for improvement on some of the writing structure. This is a very long article at 111kB of prose, which might be appropriate given the specificity, but makes it more important to consider how it will be read. Throughout this article there are numerous one or two sentence paragraphs based off a single source, which don't integrate well into the surrounding text. Part of this may be the result of such items often being cited to primary sources like a parliamentary description page, which do not provide context or analysis. Another cause is reporting on minor moments or incidents, that may not have had long-term impact.Related is the way the article jumps between chronological and topic-based information. Broadly, it seems like the first few sections (up to "Post-leadership") are meant to be chronological, but often see a topical jump to another time (eg. "Irish politics" within "Labour in opposition (1982–1997)" jumps at the end to "In 2017, Corbyn said that..."). Perhaps it would be better to condense the timeline sections to the more important moments, leaving summaries of topical views and analysis regarding these to later sections. Regarding political positions, this is a section full of disconnected and often very small topics (contributing greatly to a lengthy table of contents). This is most clear in the lengthy "Foreign Affairs" subsection, which has small and in some places seemingly arbitrary splits (eg. why is "Nuclear weapons" separate from "War and Peace", why does "Tunisian wreath-laying controversy" have a section outside of "Israel and Palestine"?). This section is one with a subarticle (Political positions of Jeremy Corbyn), so it would be well served by having a more holistic summary than a series of disconnected subsections.On an unrelated point, it may be worth considering an international audience of the article. Jargon like "had the whip removed" will not be easily understood by those unfamiliar with British politics. Best, CMD (talk) 16:11, 13 September 2022 (UTC)