User:Mjoh364/Sea Otter/Lillycazayoux Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Mjoh364


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Mjoh364/Sea_Otter?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Sea otter

Evaluate the drafted changes
I think its difficult to add sentences in the middle of an already written paragraph but the bits you added definitely contribute interesting details and flow very well. Maybe you could add about why the decompression of the air pocket when diving deeper is a helpful adaptation. Or if it's not something that helps the otter maybe include that, because reading it I am unsure if that is an advantageous characteristic or not. I think this clarity is most important. However I see that you describe it more in the second bit of your writing. But the diet section and the description section are relatively far apart in the original article so it might not hurt to just add why it might be disadvantageous in the first bit as well. I didn't think to put some of my information into already written paragraphs so I will relook into my article to see if theres a better place for some of my information. The order makes a lot of sense because you talk about the decompression and then later reference it in a following paragraph. I think all the information added is concise but still includes enough. There isn't any kind of persuasion to come to any conclusion. The only word that doesn't could possibly not feel neutral is "major", but in context works. Literally each sentence is followed by a citation link. Both websites are reliable, but one of them did appear to from 1989 which is a bit dated. One of the websites was sourced more than the other but both clearly contributed especially because the one that wasn't sourced as many times was sourced to the bigger part of the article addition. One of the articles I can't access past the abstract so I don't know if the information is stated in the reference. The other reference the information is easy to find in the article.