User:ModernViolet/The American Woman's Home/Cliopentimento Peer Review

General info
ModernViolet
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 * Link to draft you're reviewing:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:ModernViolet/The_American_Woman%27s_Home?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template:
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):

Evaluate the drafted changes
Good job with this draft. It's a solid draft, and but it needs a bit of work, both at the level of writing (there is vague, unclear writing throughout) and in terms of giving more space and substance to the ideas in the book. Please see my notes below and let me know if you have any questions. KM

Lead
The American Woman’s Home, published in 1869 and co-authored by Catharine Beecher and her sister Harriet Beecher Stowe, presents her views on domesticity and the home as influenced by revivalism and Puritanism. (THIS IS A BIT MISLEADING AND SHOULD BE CLARIFIED ESP SINCE PURITANISM IS NOT MENTIONED AGAIN IN THIS ENTRY. SHE MIGHT HAVE BEEN REFERRING TO AN OLDER AGE OF PURITANISM, BUT PURITANISM PRECEDED THE ERA THAT BEECHER WROTE THIS BOOK. IF YOU'RE GOING TO SAY IT WAS AN INFLUENCE, NECESSARY TO EXPLAIN EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN BY THAT.) Beecher's efforts with this work were ministerial in nature (WORD CHOICE? NOT SURE WHAT MINISTERIAL MEANS) and presented a Christian household. (AN IDEALIZED CHRISTIAN HOUSEHOLD?) Her approach ENVISIONED A HOUSEHOLD THAT COULD COMBINE [combined] the home, church, and school in one household. She believed that by acknowledging women’s role as homemakers as central and necessary, in turn, women could produce a positive effect on the moral codes(WORD CHOICE) of society. The American’s Woman’s Home, ultimately prioritizes necessity over excessive furnishing or decor within her designs of the home. It additionally sought to eliminate the distinction between private and public spaces through the creation of communal spaces and lack of servant-aid. Through such elements, Beecher believed the role of the family would be reintroduced into the home and women’s inherent roles in housework and nurturing of the family could thrive. Such an effect, in turn, could yield positive effects on American society at this time. Moreover, she believed it could liberate families from the elaborate designs presented in the male-dominate field of architecture. (WHAT WERE THE ELABORATE DESIGNS?)

Early Life
Catharine Beecher was born in 1800 (WHEN? WHERE? EXPLAIN WHO HER FAMILY MEMBERS WERE. THEY WERE EXTREMELY INFLUENTIAL FIGURES) and assumed various roles pertaining to matters of women (? VAGUE AND UNCLEAR WORDING ). She worked as an educator and author, especially pertaining to women’s role as homemakers. (AGAIN VAGUE WORDING--AN EDUCATOR AND AUTHOR WHO ENDORSED AND INSTRUCTED ON WOMEN'S ROLE AS HOMEMAKERS? USE MORE PRECISE LANGUAGE AND WORDS) Moreover, Beecher’s work was particularly associated with the introduction of women’s participation in higher education. (THE WORDING IN THE ENTRY NEEDS SOME WORK. IT'S UNCLEAR THROUGHOUT. AND "WAS ASSOCIATED WITH" IS A WEAK WAY TO EXPLAIN ANYTHING. WERE WOMEN ENTERING HIGHER EDUCATION IN THESE YEARS? WHAT WAS HER SPECIFIC ROLE IN THAT REGARD?) Her focus on women’s role as homeworkers and education maintained an intrinsic connection. (DOES NOT MAKE SENSE) She advocated for the role women assumed as homemakers, tending to the family and the home itself, to be treated as a science. She argued in order for women to properly assume their role as homemakers, they must receive higher education. In 1816, Roxana Beecher, Catharine’s mother, died of consumption. Consequently, Beecher assumed and performed many domestic responsibilities, including the cutting and sewing of her own clothes and her sibling's clothes. Such a role alongside Beecher’s close relationship with her father, Lyman Beecher, influenced her work as an educator greatly. His continued support and appreciation of her intellectual and feminine traits encouraged her work. More generally, Beecher’s childhood in East Hampton was based on an intense family life shaped by traditional New England ideals which later informed her work. (THERE IS SOME USEFUL INFORMATION IN THIS PARAGRAPH, BUT THE WRITING IS WEAK IN MANY PLACES. THE PARAGRAPH NEEDS TO BE RE-ORGANIZED AND RE-WRITTEN)

Synopsis
The book’s thirty-eight chapters cover a large variety of subjects: from interior design to technical descriptions of air purification systems to guiding principles regarding Christian child rearing. The book includes a highly detailed description of the ideal home, including floor plans, individual room layouts, and detailed diagrams of decorative elements.

The American Woman’s Home was published following Beecher’s work Treatise of Domestic Life, (YEAR OF PUBLICATION?) both of which rejected spaces within the home that were used occasionally. (LIKE WHAT?) In this work(WHICH ONE?), Beecher advocated against the use of fanciful and ornate decor and argued instead to reallocate those funds towards the kitchen. TOWARD WHAT IN THE KITCHEN? Generally, Beecher presented a preference for utility over furnishings. Harriet Beecher worked on chapters pertaining to gardening and furnishing and offered recommendations for furnishing inexpensively. The family home was presented in the form of a proposed cottage.(WHAT'S A PROPOSED COTTAGE? DO YOU MEAN SHE PROPOSED A FAMILY HOME TO BE A COTTAGE?) Beecher’s cottage would be small but inherently complex. A key feature of this residence was its focus on communal space. Beecher’s design combined the dining area and sleeping quarters into one space. (MEANING THAT THERE WAS NO DISTINCTION BETWEEN BEDROOM AND DINING AREA? EXPLAIN MORE CLEARLY) Thus, the space became used throughout the day and not solely at times for eating. Moreover, she offered specific techniques such as how to transform a wardrobe into a room divider, contributing to the cost-effective nature of the home. Additionally, she believed the kitchen should be extensively equipped with appliances (WHAT APPLIANCES? BE SPECIFIC) allowing it to be used to its full extent. Moreover, her proposed cottage was not designed to host additional house-workers and instead gave those roles to the family and women of the household. (TO THE WOMEN AND THE CHILDREN? DID MEN DO ANY OF THE HOUSEHOLD LABOR?)

Impact
Catherine Beecher wrote her book in the middle of the nineteenth century, during a time when many of her feminist counterparts focused their campaigns and goals around the attainment of women’s suffrage. Her book, released in 1869, demonstrated a contestation between the feminist focus on suffrage during the period and Beecher’s emphasis on education and the Christian theology as being central pillars in the lives of women. (THIS SENTENCE IS CONFUSING AND NEEDS TO BE RE-WRITTEN. BREAK IT INTO TWO SENTENCES AND EXPLAIN IF AN ACTUAL CONFLICT EXISTED BETWEEN HER AND SUFFRAGISTS, AND IF SO EXPLAIN THAT MORE. MANY SUFFRAGISTS ALSO THOUGHT EDUCATION AND CHRISTIANITY SHOULD BE CENTRAL PILLARS SO THAT DOES NOT IN ITSELF EXPLAIN THE CONFLICT.)

The period in which Beecher wrote The American Woman’s Home also coincided with the Reconstruction Era. (MAKE SURE TO HYPERLINK TO OTHER WIKIPEDIA ENTRIES THROUGHOUT YOUR ENTRY) Larger social developments – including rapid industrialization, urban growth, and the rise of concentrated wealth – shaped the broader influences that transformed U.S. society; subsequently influencing the work of feminists during this time as they responded to these societal reconfigurations. Specifically, the communitarian movement, which advocated for communal living during its initial rise in popularity during the 1840s; (DELETE THE SEMICOLON) had a notable resurgence in the 1870s during the Reconstruction Era as a result of the publication of Catharine Beecher’s The American Woman’s Home. (EXPLAIN THIS MORE. DID HER BOOK ADVOCATE COMMUNAL LIVING? IT SEEMED TO BE FOR JUST ONE FAMILY, NO?) Beecher drew upon the ongoing wave of migration (OF WHOM?) to the ‘uplands of the South’ (WHICH WAS WHERE?) (USE DOUBLE QUOTATION MARKS NOT SINGLE ONES) as The American Woman’s Home guided these migrants from the New England region on how to craft an American Christian life in this new region that managed to escape from many of the evils of the modern world. (AWKWARD WORDING HERE)

Beecher’s works prior to The American Woman’s Home – including her Treatise on Domestic Economy which was written in the midst of the Panic of 1837 – familiarized herself (AWK WORDING) with public writings for women (WHAT ARE PUBLIC WRITINGS FOR WOMEN?) and women’s advocacy; (USE COMMA NOT SEMICOLON) thereby providing valuable resources to literate women who shared and spread her early works as they built her foundational audience. (AWK WORDING)

'''TRY TO SAY MORE ABOUT HER INFLUENCE AND THE BOOK'S INFLUENCE. DO YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION ON HOW MANY COPIES IT SOLD, FOR INSTANCE? OR HOW WIDELY IT WAS READ? THAT WOULD BE USEFUL TO INCLUDE HERE.'''