User:Morwenna782/Na Hyeseok/KoreanArtHistory.. Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Morwenna782


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Morwenna782/Na_Hyeseok?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Na Hyeseok

Evaluate the drafted changes
What does this article do well:

I like your contribution in some of her existing artworks and the fact that you included as much details as possible. I also liked your explanation as to why Na was able to continue her career even though it wasn't profitable and provided the context that it was not common at the time. I like how you included the discussion around Sinyoja because that is something not many people know about, nor did we learn it in class. And the fact that you are able to find so many details about it is impressive. Also sources seem pretty legit.

Any turn of phrases that describe the subject in a clear way:

I think the first two paragraphs of the article body are worded a bit awkwardly, make sure you pay attention to how well your article flows especially in between turns of concepts.

Changes I would suggest:

I will say maybe if you make a distinct section of her achievements or artworks, it will be more clear to the readers and structured better. You said Na being able to continue pursuing art was partially because of her husband, so maybe expand a bit on that and link the wikipedia article (if it exists) of her husband in your article too so it's easier for readers to continue their extensive research. Also as mentioned above, when you finalize the article, pay attention to its flow. For your section "Career", I feel like it mostly only talked about her Sinyoja journal, which I'm sure is part of her career, but I doubt that's all she did. So I will say perhaps change the section name into "Sinyoja journal" or variations of that if you are mainly talking about the journal itself. Plus you already mentioned some of her career content in your article body. So make sure structures are clear and each section talks about what the section name suggests. "Lead" also confuses me but I doubt you HAVE to include this section, but if you do decide to include it, I will say expand it beyond just "artwork".

Most important thing I think the Author should improve:

Make sure structures are clear and each section talks about what the section name suggests. I would also love to see some more images, especially of the artworks, if you are able to find them.

Did I notice anything about the article you reviewed that could be applicable to my own article:

I should pay more attention to in text citing in my own article.