User:Mth52b/sandbox

Peer Review by Zesgf4 (talk) 16:41, 22 March 2019 (UTC)
1.) The wording is well structured, smooth information flow. The amount of new information that was added in the revised version of the article. Spacing out the and putting sections to the background of the woman.

2.) The last section "Influence on Eugenics" needs a bit more information on the sub-topic. Since, it is a pretty general overview. It would give more insight into Davenport's life and how she made more of an impact. (I contacted the other group doing this article and they said that they wanted to do research on this.)

3.) The most important thing would be to continue researching and adding so far it's going pretty well.

4.) I need more flow and information additions, also the way my citations need to be added should be similar to their format in this article.

Zesgf4 (talk) 16:41, 22 March 2019 (UTC)

note: one more source: https://thenewinquiry.com/blog/white-feminism-and-eugenics-the-case-of-gertrude-davenport/ K8shep (talk) 23:06, 9 March 2019 (UTC)

Peer Review by APowell93 (talk) 17:15, 22 March 2019 (UTC)
You did a really good job expanding the information about Gertrude Crotty Davenport. Looking at the original article, it is a small stub and two paragraphs, with no headers to differentiate between different areas of her life.

Suggested Changes:

-Consider adding more intermediate citations. What I mean by this is in your “Home Life and Education” section, you describe a lot of dates of when her kids were born and when she graduated from the University of Kansas, and cite the information later in the paragraph. The content seems correct based on the sources later in the paragraph, but a layer of polish could be added to make sure each fact is cited. (I added the extra citations, but I'm worried it makes the paragraph cluttered by using the same source 4 times in two lines.)

-Additionally, at the beginning of the “Scientific Career” section, you describe how her and her husband’s work led to the foundation of the Eugenics movement. I feel like you should have a citation for this claim. (Added a citation where it states the davenport's at the eugenic record office became the center of the usa eugenics movement in the progressive era.)

-You could also link the works her and her husband created to Wikipedia articles of the articles, if they exist. (no wiki articles on their works)

-In the paragraph describing her individually authored works, consider describing each work after the work’s title. (added some basic information on the monographs and the co-authored work. Will consider going more in depth, but I want to keep the article about Gertrude, not a summary of her work.)

-In the influence on Eugenics, you could add some information about if she was involved in the movement (and if so, to what extent) after the information you have in there. (The other group said that they wanted to do this so I will let them.)

-If you can find an image of her, I think it would really complete the article. (I do have an image of her and her family, I just haven't added it yet. I do agree that an image would really complete the article though.)

-Minor grammar changes to consider: Under “Home Life and Education” remove the comma after “Here, she met…”. (Done)

-Under “Scientific Career” remove the comma before which in the first sentence and add a comma before and. (Done)

-I think you might have typo-ed the date of when The Primitive Streak was authored, unless it was published posthumously. (Yes, it was a typo. Originally published in 1896 not 1986)

-The first sentence of “Influence on Eugenics” is a run-on sentence. Consider: “During her time working with Charles, he was appointed the director of the Station for Experimental Evolution, also known as Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory, in 1904. This is where the Davenports…” Under the same header, I don’t think you need to include that it was 6 years later when they opened the Eugenics Record Office if you include the year in which it was opened. (That flows better, I will make those changes.)

The most important thing you could do to improve the article is really to just continue doing what you are already doing, expanding out sections of her life to better understand her as a person. Any changes I have proposed have been fairly minor at best. Giving the article a little more content then a layer of polish should be more than enough to drastically improve the base article.

I really liked how you split up Gertrude’s life into different sections. My article isn’t about one individual, but it does help me see how to divide social aspects from science in terms of organization, making information easier to find. You also did a very good job of expanding about 150 words about Ms. Davenport into hundreds, making not only information on her more accessible, but really proving her notability in her field.

APowell93 (talk) 17:15, 22 March 2019 (UTC)

Editing Gertrude Crotty Davenport
 Original Version: 

Gertrude Crotty Davenport (1866–1946), was an American biologist and instructor at the Brooklyn Institute of Arts and Sciences who studied embryology, development, and heredity. The wife of Charles Benedict Davenport, a prominent eugenicist, she co-authored several works with her husband and was influential in his interest in eugenics.

Gertrude Anna Crotty was born 28 February 1866, in Asequa, Colorado, which is near Denver, Colorado, to parents William and Millie (Armstrong) Crotty. She graduated from Kansas State University in 1889 and was graduate student of Radcliffe College from 1892 to 1894. She married Charles Davenport in Burlington, Kansas on June 23, 1894 and had two daughters; the eldest, Millia, became a noted theater scholar. With her husband she co-authored the text books Introduction to Zoology (Macmillan, 1900) and Elements of Zoology (Macmillan, 1911), and individually authored monographs including The Primitive Streak and Notochordal Canal in Chelonia and Variation in the Number of Stripes on the Sea-anemone, Sagartia luciae. She died on 8 March 1946, in Upper Nyack, New York.

Above is copied directly from the current Gertrude Crotty Davenport Wikipedia article.

 Edited Version: 

Gertrude Crotty Davenport (1866–1946), was an American zoologist who worked at established research centers such as the University of Kansas and the Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory. The wife of Charles Benedict Davenport, a prominent eugenicist, she co-authored several works with her husband. Together, they were highly influential in the United States eugenics movement during the progressive era.

Home Life and Education

Gertrude Anna Crotty was born 28 February 1866, in Asequa, Colorado to parents William and Millie (Armstrong) Crotty. She graduated from the University of Kansas with a zoology degree in 1889, where she stayed as an instructor for three years before she left to pursue a higher degree as a graduate student at Radcliffe College from 1892 to 1894. Here she met and eventually married her instructor Charles Davenport. The Davenports married in Burlington, Kansas on June 23, 1894 and went on to have three children. The eldest child was Millia Crotty Davenport, who was born on 30 March 1895. The middle child, Jane Joralemon Davenport, was born on 11 September 1897. The youngest, Charles Benedict Davenport Jr., was born on 8 January 1911. She died on 8 March 1946, at the age of 80, in Upper Nyack, New York.

Scientific Career

The Davenports had a productive working relationship which yielded many scientific works through the years, and came to be the center of the eugenics movement in the United States during the progressive era. The works they published together covered a variety of topics, ranging from zoology textbooks to genetic studies. They wrote two textbooks together, the first of which was written for secondary students titled Introduction to Zoology, and the second textbook was Elements of Zoology: To Accompany the Field and Laboratory Study of Animals which was to be used as a guide for zoology studies and experimentation. Charles and Gertrude's studies on genetics included Heredity of Skin Pigmentation in Man, Heredity of Eye Color in Man, and Heredity of Hair-Form in Man. During the course of these studies and publications, the Davenports explored how human traits, specifically skin pigmentation, eye color, and hair traits, were passed on to the next generation with Mendelian genetics. Each study also includes a "practical application" statement on how the marriage two individuals with certain traits influences the passing of said traits.

Along with the works produced with her husband, Ms. Davenport also individually authored the monographs The Primitive Streak and Notochordal Canal in Chelonia in 1896 and Variation in the Number of Stripes on the Sea-anemone, Sagartia luciae in 1903. In the former study, the notochordal canal in turtle embryos was observed as the embryos developed. This study produces a series of descriptions of how the notochordal canal develops and some implications based off its development. In the latter study, she examined sea-anemone taken from Cold Spring Harbor. Under a microscope, the sea anemones' cell division was examined in both natural conditions and underneath artificially placed strain. During and after the division processes, the various stripe characteristics were noted and recorded from different samples.

Influence on Eugenics

During her time working with Charles, he was appointed (in 1904) the director of the Station for Experimental Evolution, also known as Cold Spring Harbor Laboratory, in 1904. This is where the Davenports worked on their Mendelian genetics studies, transitioning the station into a center for genetic and eugenic research. In 1910, Charles and Gertrude opened the Eugenics Record Office, also located in Cold Spring Harbor. The office became the center of the United States progressive era eugenics movement as the main location of both eugenics research and propaganda. Mth52b (talk) 00:30, 17 March 2019 (UTC)

Mth52b (talk) 19:40, 21 March 2019 (UTC)