User:Mullerybrux/Freshwater marsh/MitchKrings Peer Review

Review is at the bottom past the grey box!

General info
Mullerybrux
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Mullerybrux/Freshwater marsh
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Freshwater marsh

Evaluate the drafted changes
Lead:

I think the lead has a solid start of explaining what freshwater marshes are. However, I think it doesn't seem to touch on some key parts of the article just yet, such as its impacts on soil, animals, or hydrology (comparing what you wrote with the whole article itself). For what you edited specifically, I think it could touch more on some of the redox reactions that occur under the functions and services section or why it's important to try and keep restoration and conservation front and center. It definitely does a good job of explaining where freshwater marshes grow and some of the different materials that make them up, so well done there!

Content:

I think that the content that was added was solid. You cover quite a few new paragraphs which I like and it adds more to the paper (I especially like the statistics you put in to give more quantification to some of the key concepts - like deforestation). I think that with the types of freshwater marshes section could be elaborated upon maybe a little bit more. It's not a bad section by any means, but I feel like I don't really understand what this tells me about the marshes (of course that could be my own ignorance about marshes coming through). Overall, I really like what you wrote!

Tone and Balance:

I don't have too much to say here. I think the tone throughout your edits is consistent and isn't really biased one way or the other, so good job.

Sources and References:

From what I looked over, the sources look good. My only worry is that some of them appeared to be relied on quite heavily at certain points of the article. Namely, sources 2 and 12 in the sandbox (2 and 14 in the actual article itself). All of the Types of freshwater marshes section relies on 2 and an entire paragraph in the functions and services used 12/14 only. I don't know if those sources are the only source of info you found on those particular points (if so, then so be it), but I think giving more sources to those sections would make it seem like you aren't relying too heavily on those specific sources.

Organization:

So I think the changes reflected in your sandbox are better for the state of the article itself with the types of marshes appearing before some of the other information. I think it would make sense to be the first thing that is after the lead. I'm not sure where exactly you were planning on putting it (such as after the vegetation or animals section or the lead), but that would be my thoughts on where it would fit in best. Besides that I think the page flows nicely, but perhaps it would be good to move the functions and services section up with the types of freshwater marshes section. That way, after explaining the types you could go into why we care about them on a broader scale before the rest of the article dives into some of the more specific aspects of their functions (such as vegetation, how it affects animals, etc.). I think it works as is to, but that's just an idea.

Images:

I think the image that was added of the soil is good. Maybe another image could be added to show how freshwater marshes have changed over the years (to help reflect that lost 90% stat you have in that section).

Overall thoughts:

I like it! I think you added in some good information that gives some important quantification about some of the concepts outlined in the original article. I think the lead could be fine-tuned a bit more to reflect what you added in particular and some other aspects of the article (including some information that should have been present in the lead that reflects what the original author wrote). I think reorganizing the article will help it flow better, and I think that the types of freshwater marshes section could be altered a little bit to give it more weight. It kind of feels a little list like right now, but I'm sure you'll make good changes for it.