User:MuseumHours/Library of Congress Subject Headings/RebLAHIS Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(provide username) MuseumHours


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:MuseumHours/Library_of_Congress_Subject_Headings?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

That's a interesting article to work for. Your structure of the article you are working on is pretty good, as you has input some solid references to support your researches. For the second paragraph, I think you can change a little bit on the tone of writing. Now, it is more like writing a paper. My suggestion is that you can read more wiki articles, in order to catch the tone. Maybe you can reduce the term, like 'first'. Overall the article is good. Looking forward to you to expand your article.