User:Ngwanyana/African-American beauty/NEMO LEGEND Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(Ngwanyana)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User:Ngwanyana/African-American_beauty&veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template&redirect=no


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * African-American beauty

Evaluate the drafted changes
- Organization of this article draft on African American beauty is different. You have chosen to put everything in the lead section of the article and that might not be the best for all the new contributions you are making. However many of them seem like they could fit well into the lead section of the article. I think your first and third paragraphs are things that could be in the lead of the article but, the second paragraph would fit better in its own sub heading.

- I do like how you intergraded the sources throughout the paragraphs and each one seems to reliable. In the second paragraph maybe find another source that can back up your source number 4.

- The third paragraph has 3 different sources in it and I really think that it will be a great contribution to the article and make the lead more reliable.

- I like how you linked some words in your first article to other Wikipedia websites an think you should do that for some of the words in the rest of the draft. Maybe the word Intersectionality in your third paragraph?

- Lastly some media representation would be nice The article has one picture and I think some more pictures would help it a lot.