User:Nletofsky/sandbox

Paralytic agents are not suggested for use in sepsis cases in the absence of ARDS, as a growing body of evidence points to reduced durations of mechanical ventilation, ICU and hospital stays. However, paralytic use in ARDS cases remains controversial. When appropriately used, paralytics may aid successful mechanical ventilation, however evidence has also suggested that mechanical ventilation in severe sepsis patients does not improve oxygen consumption and delivery.

Comments
Thanks for sharing these improvements. I have a few notes: Great work so far JenOttawa (talk) 17:13, 6 November 2018 (UTC)
 * You did a nice job adding your citation and placing it in the text
 * Is ARDS defined earlier in the WP article?
 * Can you try to add more lay terminology (common English) to your suggestion? I know it is hard to dub down something so technical, but try to make it so someone who is not in medicine can understand it.
 * Add a citation after every sentence