User:Oceana428/Anime/Led234 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Oceana428


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Oceana428/Anime?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Anime

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Lead- You have not rewritten the lead but that is okay because the lead on this article is pretty exhaustive and I don't think there is much you should really contribute in regards to the lead.

Content- The content you have written would fit in with the “Globalization and cultural impact” subheading located in the article so good job on that. Your references are also fairly up to date and you have pulled from a number of academic sources such as journals which is good.

Tone- The tone of the content is fairly neutral though I feel the line “ the popularity of anime and the Japanese culture…” is not neutral, you could instead just say something along the line as “As anime and Japanese culture continues to grow.”  Also I feel the line “ Many fans are drawn to Japanese culture and seeing Japan one day for themselves” is not neutral and to generalized of a statement, if you could include a citation here that would support this claim than it would be alright.

Sources- You have pulled some good sources that addresses your topic directly and are academic sources. There is also a pretty solid number of sources for the section that you are writing.

Origination- the organization of your contribution was clear and flowed well. I didn’t see any mistakes or errors.

Overall- This is a well written article and your contribution to the article is relevant to the changing world and will be good. You do need to work on the tone of your writing however but other than that it is good.