User:Pharohk

The most amazing point in egyptian history was when King Shlopenblurg(AKA The Scorpion king) ruled. He was known throughout the ancient world as the bloodlust king. On his tomb walls are graphic depictions of him eating newborns, and occasionallly perfoming surgery in order to eat the baby before it got all tough and unkosher(pickles) and also eating the now dead mothers uterus after stuffing it with a mix containing crocadile feces to try and prevent the dead woman from getting pregnant again. He did this because the women would become part of his harem until the point that they rotted too badly that it was disgusting and/or impossible. After this the body would be rather uncerimoniously dumped in the nile where it was so defiled not even the crocadiles would eat it. These corpses occasionally washed up in Rome. This is how they learned abortion. His favorite food was babies before their third month. He was also known to devour anyone who disagreed right then and there...like he took his harem girls. :D Also depicted is his twenty meter long necklace of ovaries and lapis lazuli. This was considered to be his good luck charm, as when he wore it he would always find the next addition to his harem and it was also said he could feel no pain while wearing it. He lived up to his nickname the bloodlust king when he was horribly assasinated by his fourtieth sister after their honeymoon. Her excuse was that he "attempted to shove crocadile dung up her vagina". His trusted adviser BubbasDick(Who's ovaries were the size of apricots) then became pharoh.