User:Piper5625/Genetic variability/Ebbenw Peer Review

General info
Piper5625
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Piper5625/Genetic_variability?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Genetic variability

Evaluate the drafted changes
The lead section of the article is strong and clear. It gives readers a good understanding of what is to come.

I appreciate how Piper explains the implications of genetic variation as it relates to biodiversity in a way that even a non-scientific audience could understand.

The statement "Recombination is random for the most part" seems somewhat redundant to me. If the cause of the randomness is caused by the variation in the genes which control it, I feel as though it is adequately addressed in the following sentence. However, if there are additional factors underlying this randomness, then I feel as though they should be explained more directly. Also, I was confused by what is meant by "for the most part." I think that this would be considered a hedging phrase, and made me wonder which 'parts' are random and which are not.

I like the addition "Generally, it is more common in areas where there are a higher number of genes." as it adds more specificity to the process of recombination. I may slightly change it though to read "Generally, it is more common in areas on the chromosome where there are a higher number of genes." for additional clarity.

I appreciate that Piper is explaining that different mutations can have varying severity:


 * "Additionally, not all types of mutations occur as much as others do. Some mutations might have a huge impact on the human body, and some might not. It depends on what combination of base pairs is changed. "

However, I am not sure that this addition belongs where it has been placed. It is under the heading: Factors that decrease genetic diversity. It it my understanding that the DNA repairs which fix mutations are what decrease genetic diversity. Therefore, I think that the main focus of this paragraph should be on the DNA repair. Talking about the impact of different mutations could be helpful for readers, but I think it should be done elsewhere or even in a new section.