User:Ptsl



There once was a man whose name was Кузнецов. He left his house to go to a shop to buy some carpenter's glue so as to stick a stool.

When Кузнецов was walking past an unfinished house, a brick fell off the top and hit Кузнецов on the head.

Кузнецов fell, but straight away jumped to his feet and felt over his head. On Кузнецов's head a huge lump had come up.

Кузнецов gave the lump a rub and said: – Я гражданин Кузнецов, вышел из дома и пошел в магазин, чтобы... чтобы... чтобы... Ах, что же это такое! Я забыл, зачем я пошел в магазин!

At this point a second brick fell off the roof and again Кузнецов was struck on the head.

– Ах! – cried Кузнецов, clutching at his head and feeling a second lump on his head.

– Вот так история! – said Кузнецов. – Я гражданин Кузнецов, вышел из дома и пошел в... пошел в... пошел в ... куда же я пошел? Я забыл, куда я пошел!

Then a third brick fell from the top on to Кузнецов's head. And on Кузнецов's head a third lump came up.

– Ай-ай-ай! – yelled out Кузнецов, snatching at his head. – Я гражданин Кузнецов, вышел из... вышел из... вышел из погреба? Нет. Вышел из бочки? Нет! Откуда же я вышел?

A fourth brick fell from the roof, hit Кузнецов on the back of the head and a fourth lump came up on Кузнецов.

– Ну и ну! – said Кузнецов, scratching the back of his head. – Я... я... я... Кто же я? Никак я забыл, как меня зовут? Вот так история! Как же меня зовут? Василий Петухов? Нет. Николай Сапогов? Нет. Пантелей Рысаков? Нет. Ну кто же я?

But then a fifth brick fell off the roof and so struck Кузнецов on the back of the head that Кузнецов forgot everything once and for all and, crying "О-го-го!", ran off down the street.

If you wouldn't mind! If anyone should meet a man in the street with five lumps on his head, please remind him that his name is Кузнецов and that he has to buy some carpenter's glue and repair a broken stool.