User:Quadratus/Really, Really, Really Good Bad Jokes and Other Deleted Nonsense

=From Bad_Jokes_and_Other_Deleted_Nonsense_is_watching_you.=

Anagrams
Anagrams are often expressed in the form of an equation, with the equals symbol (=) separating the original subject and the resulting anagram. ‘Earth = heart’ is an example of a simple anagram expressed in that way. In a more advanced, sophisticated form of anagramming, the aim is to ‘discover’ a result that has a linguistic meaning that defines or comments on the original subject in a humorous or ironic way; e.g,

Roll in the hay = Thrill a honey (discovered by Tony Crafter),

Desperation = a rope ends it

Mother-in-law = woman Hitler,

Slotmachines = Cash lost in em.

PRESIDENT SADDAM HUSSEIN = DISPENSED HUMAN DISASTER

When the subject and the resulting anagram form a complete sentence, a tilde (~) is commonly used instead of an equal sign; e.g.,

Semolina ~ is no meal.

Somewhere Over the Rainbow ~ Worrisome However Beneath. I hate school~oh so ethical

The Monkeys write ~ The New York Times A shoplifter ~ has to pilfer Christine ~ Nice Shirt

Other examples include: Osama Bin Laden= A damn alien SOB

Disneyland= Lady sinned

Universal Studios= Industrious slave

United states of America= Aim it at us, Confederates!

Disney World= Old dry swine

Clint Eastwood= Old West Action

Schoolmaster= The classroom

Tom Cruise= So I'm Cuter

'''Snooze Alarms= Alas! No More Z's ''' A Decimal Point= I'm a Dot in Place

Statue of Liberty= Built to Stay Free

Microsoft's Internet Explorer= Complexities front ten errors

Adam Sandler= Darn Sad Male

DRINKING=DRINK GIN

MARTINI=RAM IT IN

David Letterman= Nerd Amid Late TV John Forbes Kerry = jerky fresh boron Extensively Long Anagrams-Traveling Oxygen Salesman

Osama Bin Laden= I be so damn anal

MY LIFE IS OVER = VILE OF MISERY

Breasts = Bra sets

Otis spunkmeyer*=its super monkey!

Hello Kitty = Kill The Toy

Chemistry - shit, me cry

Flamethrower= oh, felt warmer

The Holy Bible = Be Hit By Hello

'''Year two thousand = a year to shut down  Stairway to Heaven - Heavy Wire to Satan'''

Elvis= Lives

Orange hair - Beware!
Orange hair is a deadly disease. It has been around for many years (16 years). Ever since it (or she) started breating, it has been destroying the world, one hair at a time. The symptoms of this disease are: big (huuuuuuuge!) mouth, blue eyes, overly loooonnnnggg and ugliness and a half hair. People affected by this disease have a tendency to be odd, weird and annoying. If you see someone with orange hair, you must STAB them with a fork (a normal kitchen fork will do) in the RIGHT side of the head. It is important!!!! Go people with no orange hair!!!

From Jesus
It is known that Jesus now comes in spray form. You can buy him at your local Wal-Mart.

Jesus Spray
Jesus Spray, like I tried to say before, is a new product by WWJD Productions. If a human being sprays it at a non-believer, then the non-believer will turn into a devout Christian. If you spray it enough times, then the person may even turn into Jesus of Nazareth he-self. This would be the second Coming of Christ. You can get it at Wal-Mart, and yeah, ya might wanna try it, sounds pretty kewl to me. Don't delete this! This is a real product I've seen with my own eye!

Ash Catchem! (Rated NC-17)
ash catchem is the pokemon master! and he gives it to pikachu in the ass! and then comes on his red cheeks! and then has flaming anal sex with charmander. ash decided to become a pokemon trainer when he was a little boy when he masterbated to his pokemon video's. so one day he decided to get out of bed and go "i want to rape pokemon!" so the next thing you know that sick little fuck is having sex with rock pokemon things.

Homosaurus
Homosaurus was first found in 1987 by Sheryl Leach in Dallas, Texas. It is a large purple Tyrannosaurus like creature, who conveys learning through jumping around singing children's songs with a friendly, optimistic attitude.

From Otuck Italla
Otuck Italla is a famous Nicaraguan coke dealer. Otuck has been arrested 6 times for his coke dealing. He was born in a small un-named village in Zimbabwe, and soon moved to Nicaragua as soon as he learned the coke was purer there. He was raised by his teenage mother who died of AIDS shortly after his dog died. This experience stayed with Otuck his whole life. Now whenever he makes a coke deal, he makes the buyer bark like a dog to remind him of what used to be.

Otuck is currently a bachelor and was recently named "Sexiest Man Alive, (in Nicaragua). Which isn't saying much since most of the population is starving. The only reasons he is not starving is because he makes million off coke dealing. By coke i mean the highly addictive drug and not the soda that is popular in America and other European nations. Otuck would never touch the soda because he believes it is bad for his health. Ironoically he believes the drug is fine.

Otuck has also killed 5 people, in the name of black power. Otuck sends the families of the dead a assortment of pumpkin pie. He chooses pumpkin because he doesn't like pumpkin and he wouldn't want to waste good pies like, blueberry and apple, on someone's family he just killed. He also poisons the pies.

From Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows
Joanna is a new character coming out in the last book of the Harry Potter series. She happens to grow on Harry and she becomes Harry's new love interest. Joanna is also at the battle seen where Harry and Voldemort are found fighting each other at Godric's Hallows. Harry and Voldemort shoot an 'Avada Kedavra' curse at one another and they both fall to the ground, dead. Joanna, Harry's girlfriend, comes running over to Harry and starts to cry. Her tears bring Harry back to life. Harry jumped up, releived to be alive again, and kissed someone on the lips. That person was Draco Malfoy. Joanna was so upset that she killed Draco and she went to Harry herself and slapped him across the face. Harry started to cry.

"Joanna? Why did you have to slap me like that?"

"Because you are a stupid prat!"

"Why am I a stupid prat?"

"Because you were kissing Malfoy?"

"So what if I was kissing Malfoy?"

"Oh My Gosh!! You are Gay!!"

"No...I am not..."

Ginny appeared.

"Harry isn't gay, I am..." Ginny exclaimed.

"Wow, I can't beleive you came out!" Joanna said.

"Well anyways. I am not Gay!"

"Ok!" harry and Joanna turned to face each other and they kissed.

Ginny kept looking at them.

"Ewwww! You guys are gross!"

The Epiloge

Harry and Joanna soon get married. They both become aurors to the Ministry and they are both friends with Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley they got married as well and they ended up having 17 children. Ginny Weasley, Harry's ex girlfriend was so mad that Harry loved Joanna that she turned gay. Her love interest now happens to be Luna Lovegood. But Luna didn't like Ginny so she dumped Ginny and Ginny hung herself in sadness. Meanwhile, at Ginny's funeral Harry was laughing the whole entire time, about Ginny's death. Afterword Harry and his best friend Ron went out for drinks to laugh about the whole thing together. Harry and Joanna ended up having 7 kids. They're names are Illeana, Michelle, Lily, James, Sirius, Remus. The seventh child was both a male and a female so they decided to name it Ginny Pig Potter.

I hope you liked the last 7 Harry Potter books. I have worked on these last books very hard, so you better like the way Ginny hung herself after she turned gay.

Have a nice day!


 * Honestly, this is too good not to save for the rest of humanity. --JohanTenge - /spit 22:36, 29 December 2006 (UTC)