User:RadioactiveBoulevardier/Speedrun

A ban speedrun is a speedrun where speedrunners attempt to get banned from a website of their choosing at the quickest time possible. Wikipedia is one of the websites that can be chosen for this.

Approaches
I will (even though I’m entering game guide mode) explain several approaches for a Wikipedia ban speedrun.

Vandalism


Vandalism is one of the most common and effective ways to swiftly get banned from Wikipedia. After all, there are tons of administrators carrying their mops everywhere on Wikipedia. Twinkle and ClueBotNG also exists, making your ban through vandalism incredibly easy. The catch, you can’t edit protected articles, as you’ll have to start afresh with a new account.

The other catch, you will be spammed with lots of ugly messages.

The username game
If you think editing is strenuous, don’t worry, you can always trigger the Wikipedia community with an inappropriate username. Always remember to make sure your username contains the following.

Afraid that you can’t make your username. Don’t worry! Simply name your username after a real company or political party and no one can tell the difference between a company breaking WP:NPOV and a wannabe banned user on Wikipedia. You can also impersonate a popular celebrity of your liking!
 * Fuck
 * Shit
 * Arse/asshole
 * Balls
 * Butt
 * Bitch
 * Pussy/Vagina
 * I hate
 * on

Assuming bad faith and using legal threats
Now comes the fun part, assuming bad faith. You can either call an administrator a loser or spam hate messages on their talk page! Or if you want to take it further, sue them! What’s the harm of a good ‘ol lawsuit to the face? That will get you banned in a second, but it is always best to sue that victim Florida Man after the ban.

What’s next?
Congratulations! You’ve been banned in under ten minutes! But was it really worth it? Your existing accounts may take a toll and once you actually want to edit Wikipedia, you’ll probably get backlash from the community. Do not do this no matter what.