User:Rahebradfar/New Public Management/3113N3113N Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

User:Rahebradfar


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Rahebradfar/sandbox


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * New Public Management

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Feedback provided by Ellen Hahne

Lead: I think you have a good lead into the paragraph, you set an introduction for the different reforms you will explain in the rest of the paragraph. Nicely done.

Content: The content is relevant to address NPM from a global perspective. However, it is a very broad perspective and you only touch on each case. Perhaps you could narrow it down to a few and go a little more in-depth?

Tone and Balance: You have a neutral tone throughout your text and do not lean towards promoting one idea over the other. The neutrality of your text was one of the first things I noticed and it is a prominent strength of it. Good job with that.

Sources: I think this is the section of your work that you could look to improve. You only use one source for the entire paragraph, and since you address several different reforms in that paragraph I think you can easily find more sources that specifically address each reform. In that way, you could both add the number of sources to your text but also add some more depth to the cases you're looking at. I think this could strengthen your contribution and the overall quality of your work. Right now you have a good outline to work from to do so.

Organization: You have a good organization of the text, you go from one case to another and sometimes tie them together to make a smooth transition. One thing I taught about was the word reform, I know it is central to the topic you are writing about, but see if you can make it less repeatedly throughout the text.

Images: -

Overall Impression: I think you have a good draft, both good parts, and room for some improvement. I think the biggest thing is to add more sources, and either add more depth to each case of reform or precise the focus to fewer. Just to get some more depth to the text.