User:RealShirty/Social anxiety/Peinini Peer Review

General info
RealShirty
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:RealShirty/Social_anxiety?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Social anxiety

Evaluate the drafted changes
I think the edited paragraphs are significantly more professional and cohesive than the original paragraph, which contained a lot of run-on sentences and felt more casual. All new content added is also backed up by reliable sources and is relevant to the topic. I believe two of the sources referenced in the "Child development" paragraph need to be made into footnotes ([5] and [6]).