User:ReimyLi/Ionel Rotaru/WUSTLWikiWarrior Peer Review

General info
ReimyLi
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:ReimyLi/Ionel Rotaru
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * N/A

Evaluate the drafted changes

 * Lead should be fleshed out; this doesn't really tell me anything specific about Ionel's life
 * The article doesn't have any citations. You need to add these! I don't know where you got any information from
 * I see your notes about needing to add them in your draft, but not having them at this point makes it tough to evaluate certain aspects
 * Bibliography section under draft and bibliography sandbox page also don't align
 * Excellent early life section
 * There is a noticeable content gap between early life and Romani activism sections
 * I have no idea how Rotaru went from a French artist to this king of the Gypsies
 * Also should explain why he did all of this. Why did he advocate for the Gypsies? What's the motive?
 * I would suggest flipping the two paragraphs under Supreme Leader of the Gypsies; you use the second paragraph to retroactively provide context for the first paragraph, which means I have to go and read the first paragraph a second time for it to make any sense
 * Should be noted that the info you have on the aspects you do cover is really in-depth and is explained well; the breadth of information, however, needs to be greatly expanded
 * Communauté Mondiale Gitane is a fantastic section; very in-depth, and I learn about the specific accomplishments of Rotaru
 * Maybe try to narrow the focus of the second paragraph a bit? Rotaru is only mentioned in the first and last sentences
 * This is a good place for me to reiterate the information you do have is really good; you just need to make sure that other important areas are covered at all
 * Legacy section is well-written, and is a good example of how you should be tying everything back to Rotaru
 * Reference as a model for the one Communauté paragraph I mentioned earlier that needs to be made to pertain more directly to Rotaru
 * Organization seems good, but I have no way to really conclude anything one way or another without many of the sections being complete
 * I have no idea how his life ended or how much of his own life (not just organizations he was a part of) progressed
 * Need more info to be presented chronologically
 * Tone is good throughout; you clearly made a conscious effort to avoid forming any sort of subjective narrative in the reader's mind