User:Reyalsnomed

Puma Deer
pumas deerus

The Puma Deer is a very scary animal. It lives in the coniferous forests of Washington state and Canada. Its most prominent features include its massive size, ear-piercing call, and ability to leap over the head of Shaq himself.

When scared, the Puma Deer is known to run in fear and hide between trees, or even sometimes within them. A group of hunters could find one, but give it a second and the Puma Deer will have vanished from their sights for good.

Having said that, the Puma Deer is also known for its tactics in combat. It waits for its victims to come by and then jumps out at them giving them a scream of unmentionable evil and hostility. Then, after scaring the victim (who has most likely fainted or died of a heart attack) the Puma Deer drags its body away and they are never seen again. This is truly what happened to Jimmy Hoffa, but no one has been able to find out why the animal hate him so much.

Not many are worthy to see a Puma Deer, but some of us are. Like me. And Kyle. And Zac. And Alec. But not u. U r not cool. U have no doovde. Or poospe. Or a licde tiv that's from humve and is ready for the huud. Except maybe Jacob.... Anyway, watch out for Puma Deers and make sure u don't get taken away by one. A good way to fight it off is to punch it in the pouch under its nose. That's called the "Indi" because it looks like an Indian women behind a shawl. I saw one of those a few days ago. It was pretty cool. Anyway, bye... Oh, and Puma Deers crap out skittles.

Here's some English hw from a while ago. It's kinda retarded and I wrote it when I was very tired, so don't give me any crap.

Bya!!!!!
Brandon Aspinwall September 23, 2007 Period 2 LOTF Ch. 3-4 Vocabulary

Opaque- Impossible to see through or penetrate. Opaqueness- Noun Opaque- Adjective Opaquely- Adverb Opaque- Verb (with object)

Inscrutably- Incapable of being investigated, analyzed, or scrutinized; impenetrable. Inscrutability/ Inscrutableness- Noun Inscrutable- Adjective Inscrutably- Adverb

Tacitly- Understood without being openly expressed. Tacitness- Noun Tacit- Adjective Tacitly- Adverb

Malevolently- Wishing evil or harm to another or others. Malevolent- Adjective Malevolently- Adverb

Parody- A humorous or satirical imitation of a serious piece of literature or writing. Parody- Noun Parody- Verb (with object) Parodiable- Adjective

The Coldest Day
As he turned to leave the stage, the boy bid a final farewell to his friends. He did not wish to leave them in such a solemn and tacit manner, but there was nothing else he could do. Holding back the tears, he walked off the stage, down the aisle, and out the double doors. The doors themselves seemed heavier, trying to keep in the warmth and affection of the theater inside, not allowing any of to pass through to the coldness of the world beyond. But like a lead weight on top of a piece of paper, he was able to pierce through the seal that kept those doors fixed together.

The coldness outside was bitter and tore at his skin malevolently, stabbing its icy daggers into any exposed skin he might conjure. The boy looked around and saw a tall dark man in a black suit waiting beside a dark black car, beckoning him onward with that look of sympathy in his eyes. The boy ran up to the man and grabbed onto him, tears streaming down his face, freezing as they hit the ground below, as he clung onto the man whom he called father. Today was a day they had long feared of but knew was inevitable. The boy released his father from his icy hands which went straight back into the warm depths of his coat. Slipping into the car, they drifted out of the school parking lot and towards the hospital.

The windows were opaque and revealed little of the outside world. Even with the heater, he felt as cold as if he were standing outside the car as it drove by. Nothing could warm his soul at that moment. All his belongings were in the trunk of his car: his clothes, his books, his material belongings that were inferior to the one he was soon to lose forever. Nothing could replace this. Nothing.

The car ride, lasting little more than 20 minutes, seemed an eternity to the boy. Getting out of the car seemed forever as well, for he feared facing the dreadful truth. Following the footsteps of his father in the snow, the boy kept his head down and eyes averted from all who looked upon him. As his father talked to the nurse that greeted them outside, the boy occasionally looked up to see his father listening intently, not wanting to miss a word, but not wanting to hear it either.

They finally reached the room. The nurse asked if they were sure they were ready, and, simultaneously, they agreed. She opened the door and white light from the window flooded their vision. The light receded as the nurse walked ahead. They walked down the short hallway and turned in to see the one that would soon leave them forever. The boy’s eyes fell upon the face of his dying mother.

Tears began pouring forth from his eyes as he ran up to her side and grasped her hand, never to let her go. She looked back at him for a moment, studying his face as if remembering a long lost past of happiness and joy, and wondering how that could have led to this moment. Then she smiled. She was a beautiful woman, flowing, golden hair and beautiful rosy cheeks upon a heart-shaped face with a smooth perfectly carved nose and beautiful red lips. But the most dazzling and enchanting feature she possessed was her eyes. The color of green grass from the beautiful prairies of the Midwest, her eyes could calm a wild stallion with one glance. They gave one the sense of inner piece that they could find no other place on earth.

As she looked into her son’s eyes, she told him how much she truly loved him. She held nothing back. She did not wish for this to happen, but felt that God had chosen her for a purpose. Although the reason was inscrutable to her, she did not question God’s will. He, then, told her how much he loved her, how he was sorry for ever going against her wishes, how he never truly meant to hurt her, how he would love her for eternity.

It seemed kind of ironic to him that only yesterday he had been performing in West Side Story, a sort of parody of Romeo and Juliet written by Shakespeare. That had been a wonderful day, when his worries had left his mind and he felt no heaviness in his heart. But, alas, that day was little noted in the recesses of his memories now.

Wiping the tears from his eyes he looked back at his mother and saw that she, too, was crying. She told him that she did not fear death, that it was a natural stage of life. She only cried because she was not able to see her son grow up. She wouldn’t be able to see him graduate from high school or get married. She wasn’t going to be able to see the wonderful children he would have. He would grow up, and she would be gone.

His father soon came over. He had a few words that he spoke to her silently, furtively, as if no one could hear it but her. Gentle as a leaf falling upon the ground, his lips brushed hers and, together, they spent their last few hours together as one truly joyful family…

The End.

And that's my Puma Deer thing... Don't think it'll be up for much longer. Get a good look at it and tell me what u think @ school, k? PEACE!

-Brandon

PENIS! lol k, I'm done.