User:RichardTheNixon

He was a Bear.

Richard "The Awesome" Nixon, after traversing the vast, bountiful and endless plains of Mordor, which he did simply walk into killing everything in his way including Freeto the fourteen legged spaghetti sauce man and rode on a straw made stallion, drinking straws might I add, named Spiro The Agnui-monster...on his first escapade, he circumnavigatantly traversed on the beaten path of underwater of the English Channel where he discovered the magical Helm of the United States presidency and approached his Jester, mainly known worldwide as Captain Rainbow, who bestowed upon his tibia a technicolor pimpcane which was later to be found to be a ION CANNON!!! :0 of sorts. Afterwhich he went on to complete the quest of the United State(s)(?)...an escapade that is quite difficult for bears and starfish alike. Being a multi-species/ethnic of both animals, it was a task worthy of only the greatest of heroes. This quest was started as soon as he finished eating the all of the cheese on the moon, thus making the mooninites starve.

Then he invented the waffle.

Unknown to the general public, and in man forms of Joe Cusac (not important), Richard Nixon was simultaneously the secret emperor of the Chinese ping pong teams PR firm of most honorable intentions (Or the CPPTPRFOMHI or in CHINAMANESE "Chingchongchingchingchaingchingchong) After winning the main quest of United States, our man of valor achieved the highest of the highest of           scores in the popular gaming community, Richard Tyrone Nixon (Also known as the t3h Tyroninator the three) he decided to complete the worlds first jigsaw puzzle, with real saws while forcing sir Gayasaurus the Gay (As in happy) to do a Jig of kinds.

Then Sam, KIng of Catdom said all was well in the castle and the internet was bourne.

Oh yes, I forgot to mention this took place in the year 3209 B.C.E. on Uranus (the planet)(?)(!)

HE'LL BE BACK SOON ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!05:52, 17 August 2008 (UTC)RichardTheNixon (talk) 05:52, 17 August 2008 (UTC)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Epilouge: Twas a mid summer nights mid morning moon of many kinds in the vast and endless and prettiful land of Wisconsin, when Richard Nixon was given a most honorable zviking burial, alive. As he was lowered into the grave, he immediately, with no hesiation, or remorse, or regret, or wish to go back in time, or any other feeling, coined the term "It's A Baby Kicking Good Time."

Disclaimer:

We hope you enjoyed this fictional account (or rant) of Richard M. Nixon's life as much as we enjoyed writing it. P.S. We're not trying to be mean or have poor intentions towards the Chinese peoples or the homosexual community. We're serious P.S.S. The Chinese have a really good ping pong team. :D!